On the Outside Looking In

I was talkin' with the Lord when He said to me
"Are you okay?  Need some company"?

I told Him that even with all His creatures
I couldn't find one that had my features.

"Well, no need to worry about it." He said
Then he gave me a nightcap, and put me to bed.

When I awoke I was awfully sore
Little did I know there was to be a lot more.

For He had taken a bit of my hair and a piece of bone
And whilst I slept, formed for me a unique companion.

I caller her "Eve" as it seemed to fit
As time went by we were a hit.

We would talk and eat and walk the garden nude
No neighbors as yet,  we needn't be prude.

Then one day she said to me,
"Hey Adam, here, try some fruit from this tree."

Not knowing the difference between evil and good
I took a big bite, as together we stood.

Then in a flash everything turned black
I knew we were in for some serious flak.

"What have you done?"  I asked aloud
"Was this from the tree, which was not allowed?"

"Well", she said, "The snake gave me the word
That if we ate it, we would be like the Lord."

We realized we were naked and ran off for some leaves
When the Lord started calling, we were hiding in the trees.

"What's going on?"  He said to me
"Have you eaten of the forbidden tree?"

Like all blame shifting men not skipping a beat
"Yes, Lord", I said, "Eve gave me some to eat.

"You foolish creatures . . . it would have been wise
You could have spent eternity in this Paradise."

"I'm sorry Lord, I can't say it enough."
"You're right, you can't, so I'm making this rough!

Because now, you will have to scratch out a life
For yourself, your children, and especially your wife.

If you think this is bad, you're in for a trick
Wait until some banker dreams up plastic.

She'll be shopping and buying and going all around
It'll be enough, to put you in the ground.

As for her, she'll suffer as much and more too
After all, now she'll have to put up with you!"

So an angel took us to the gate in the garden wall
Saying only, "Be careful, now it will hurt if you fall."

So there we were, On the Outside Looking In
At that manicured garden, where we committed our sin.

I wouldn't mind if so much weren't at stake
Now all she says is, "I have a headache."

I've tried to forgive her and a gentleman be
But I still can't let her control the remote for the TV.

So here I am thinking, "I've been such a dupe,
For posterity . . . I'll put this on Poetry Soup!"

Copyright © | Year Posted 2010



Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 6/21/2010 8:14:00 AM
I don't know where I was, or how I missed this terrific and funny poem....but wow...a winner for sure, Joe!! So glad for posterity....you let us read your hilarious side!! Great work!!! oh...and just returned home after a few days of being away, and see that you were kind enough to enjoy my Red Bike poem..thank you so much for choosing it among the winners in your contest! What a great contest, and such fun to write for it! Thanks again for that, and for all the encouraging words!! Love, Carrie
Login to Reply
Date: 6/1/2010 4:19:00 PM
This makes me smile after I read pd's poem. Very nice on the couplet and the write. We can't forget about the humor.Every word was excellent. Many thanxs 4 your comment. A big congratulations on your poem making it in the contest.-SKAT
Login to Reply
Date: 6/1/2010 11:53:00 AM
Incredibly funny piece Daniel, what a joy to read. I was picturing your words as i was reading. Many congratulations on your win in Linda-Marie's contest >> James
Login to Reply
Date: 5/31/2010 10:56:00 PM
Daniel , Souper piece of crazy/witty rhyming bible reading , and well done ....
Login to Reply
Date: 5/31/2010 9:58:00 PM
congratulations Daniel in your placement in this wonderful contest, my fav,..p.d.
Login to Reply
Date: 5/31/2010 5:11:00 PM
Congrats for the second place win
Login to Reply
Date: 5/31/2010 4:34:00 PM
Congrats Dan on your second place win in my ADAM in Eden contest with this dynamic write... with luv from the "Sweetheart"
Login to Reply
Date: 5/26/2010 5:54:00 PM
Daniel, I think I choose yours as one of my very favorites. You recognize the bad and good in each sex and make it fun and real at the same time. Way to go. I hope you score high! Luv, andrea
Login to Reply
Date: 5/26/2010 3:55:00 AM
Jesus, this is beyond awesome Daniel I did not think I was going to add one of these contest entries to my favs.. it gave me goose bumps the way you laid it all out for the contest. What a shame if you do not make it with this one I love it . The couplets made it more interesting, nice, going to my favs.,..p.d.
Login to Reply
Date: 5/26/2010 3:20:00 AM
Intersting perspective on the garden of eden and mans fall from grace. Nice write.
Login to Reply
Date: 5/26/2010 2:43:00 AM
different perspective, which I really enjoyed :) - rgds Wilma
Login to Reply
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter
Hide Ad