Old Bert True Story

Mean as a bucket of rusty nails, sweet as a Georgia peach You might want to knock for an hour or two, just don't walk in She will let you know if you are welcome or not Always had a double barrel scatter gun within reach She would not preach a sermon, cause you won't be causing no sin Or that is the first lesson you will be taught Life turned her that way, kidnapped when she was three By a bunch of East Texas cedar hackers, made her their slave She had to learn to fight young, later she could whip them all Late one night she made a run to get free For three days she hid in a cave To her that price was small Years later, she lived in the desert with her family Coyotes and rattle snakes never gave her any lip Built it herself, the dwelling that they lived in Around a wood burning stove the stories she would tell me Most always she had a .45 on her hip Fight a boat load of drunk sailors, I would bet on her to win Her heart never harden, even though life had been mean Give you a big hug or fight anything under the Sun Then chase it all the way to Utah Tough as rawhide. but she was a queen She had two pretty daughters, I almost up and married one Old Bert, would have been a great mother in law