Oh Brother

(tales from the viral lock-down) Brice (my brother) is cutting through what smells like a stack of cinnamon french toast. My stomach growls at the aroma like a hunting cat. I jump out of bed, grab my robe and rush excitedly to the kitchen. I see the pan in the sink. gasp “You didn’t MAKE me any!!?” I accuse, in indignant shock. Brice, looking up, “JESUS, get on some clothes!” He waves his arms like he's fighting a flock of birds. I look down, “GOD, I AM wearing clothes, you PERV! - and a bathrobe” "Who says THAT’S a bathrobe??” He says, sarcastically. Me: “Kiki Montparnasse!”, I say, indignantly. My mom enters to fill her coffee cup. Brice: “Will you please tell YOUR DAUGHTER to get on some clothes?” My mom inspects me and I twirl for my audience. “That IS a little sheer”, she pronounces. “ARGH!, FINE,” I say, before stomping off to change. I start to fume."HE CAN GO ALL OVER IN BOXER SHORTS BUT I CAN'T WEAR A BATHROBE?!!" “And HE didn’t make EXTRA TOAST”, I yell back in pointed accusation. “Get to work,” (on more toast) I hear her tell him, just before I slam my door. another day… My brother Brice is fighting with his girl-friend on the phone. Of course, I'm only hearing 1/2 the conversation - but he sounds like a jerk. Me: "apologize," I silently, slowly, exaggeratedly mouth Brice: "drop dead," he mouths back, silently Me: "I'm your sister," I say, "I get to boss you around, besides, I KNOW what’s BEST" A minute later - He actually apologizes!!! And they make up. (I dance around the room like Rocky)