Obviously
Mary Moorman took a Polaroid snap of
John Kennedy at the exact moment he
received his fatal head wound. Her
picture has fuelled many conspiracy
theories.
I’m inclined to opine
(it’s a passion of mine –
to conclusions you’ll think me
a jumper)
that assassins abound,
widely scattered around,
and they’re thicker than bugs
on a bumper!
In this photo alone
sniper gunmen unknown,
and it only takes looking
to nail ‘em.
(Boy, if I’d been around
when those witches were found,
they’d a made me the mayor
of Salem!)
Take that guy on the stairs
who’s been snapped unawares
(you would see, if we had him
in slo-mo):
he’s a pal of Rosselli,
‘cos I’ve seen him on telly,
and I’m outing him now – Perry Como!
And the perp on the plinth
with the sleazebag named Cynth –
he’s a Russian, with codename
“Zapruder”.
Wait – she’s “Marilyn”, yes?
Geez, why didn’t I guess?
Then he obviously must be …
Ry Cooder!
Between Badge Man and Ry
there’s a big hairy guy,
who is clearly preparing
to shoot.
Why can’t anyone see?
Ngo Dinh Diem, obviously –
he’s disguised in a chimpanzee suit!
Where the pergola ends –
it screams out at you, friends –
near where Cynth and Zapruder
are grappling,
waits a killer from Cuba
with poison-dart tuba,
dressed up as a sycamore sapling.
I’m alerting the Pope
to conspiracy dope
that’s contained in this
Polaroid snap –
What? The sapling is lush?
It’s a Texas-type bush?
Why’d you give me that
paranoid crap?
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