Get Your Premium Membership

Notional Health Service

[What should one do in the face of startling negligence, disguised as incompetence? I know… replace your ink with vengeance and write blood curdling verses. What should one do if Jail isn’t on your must do list? I know… tear up version one and write a namby pamby version that won’t get anyone fired but will preserve your liberty. What follows is version two…] A doctor had mush for a brain He leaped right in front of a train When he dropped his mack He jumped on the track His trousers developed a stain His competence seems to be waning Don’t ring up intent on complaining For it’s quite widely known He can’t answer a phone For that wasn’t part of his training He’s so blind he barely can cope I gave him a new stethoscope But I giggled because He could not see it was A sink plunger tied to a rope But I got the shock of my life The nutter’s at loose with a knife That incompetent clown In a surgical gown Is getting to work on my wife And now I’m so thoroughly fed up Though I proudly walk with my head up I’d do it again For I drove the train But some say I shouldn’t have sped up

Copyright © | Year Posted 2021




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 11/30/2021 2:44:00 PM
Hello Terry ... loved your set of limericks Terry. A train driver once told me that he wished trains had a steering wheel sometimes - thanks Terry - Lindsay
Login to Reply
Flood Avatar
Terry Flood
Date: 11/30/2021 3:00:00 PM
Thanks, Lindsay. A train with a steering wheel? Now there’s a thing. Terry
Date: 11/21/2021 10:17:00 AM
All we know for certain is that, "Do no harm" was not a charm!
Login to Reply
Leffanta Avatar
Rico Leffanta
Date: 11/22/2021 10:24:00 AM
Never had any problems with NHS, which provided excellent care to the wife and children! Aloha!
Flood Avatar
Terry Flood
Date: 11/21/2021 11:59:00 AM
I’d take anyone’s word for it that they got excellent service from the NHS… but the stories I’m beginning to hear now are spine chilling. Thanks, Rico. Terry
Date: 11/21/2021 3:01:00 AM
I was hoping it was a fictional write but I don't think it is. There's brilliant doctor's out there but sadly a few bad ones enter the mix. When you're dealing with people's health there is no place for incompetence. Tom
Login to Reply
Flood Avatar
Terry Flood
Date: 11/21/2021 11:56:00 AM
The nature of my ‘wife’s’ ailment was such that her survival was far from assured. For two days, SILENCE. No-one answering phones, no-one calling me. They missed her meds and then modified her meds TO EXACTLY WHAT THEY ALREADY WERE and finally decided to discharge her without telling anyone. I only found out through the grapevine. For two days I literally did not know if she was in a bed or a fridge. And that’s only part if it… but I don’t want to bore you. Terry
Date: 11/20/2021 4:52:00 PM
the situation in many hospitals is shocking Terry a serious subject dealt with with humour I love the sink plunger on a rope, of course knowing the story behind your poem I think you should have posted v 2 too! hugs Jan xx
Login to Reply
Flood Avatar
Terry Flood
Date: 11/20/2021 5:09:00 PM
Thanks Jan. The other version released the steam. All that remained in this version was the train… but the doctor didn’t exactly ‘jump’ in front of it. Terry