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Notional Health Service

[What should one do in the face of startling negligence, disguised as incompetence? I know… replace your ink with vengeance and write blood curdling verses. 

What should one do if Jail isn’t on your must do list? I know… tear up version one and write a namby pamby version that won’t get anyone fired but will preserve your liberty.

What follows is version two…]


A doctor had mush for a brain
He leaped right in front of a train
When he dropped his mack
He jumped on the track
His trousers developed a stain 

His competence seems to be waning
Don’t ring up intent on complaining 
For it’s quite widely known
He can’t answer a phone
For that wasn’t part of his training

He’s so blind he barely can cope
I gave him a new stethoscope
But I giggled because
He could not see it was
A sink plunger tied to a rope

But I got the shock of my life 
The nutter’s at loose with a knife
That incompetent clown 
In a surgical gown
Is getting to work on my wife

And now I’m so thoroughly fed up
Though I proudly walk with my head up
I’d do it again
For I drove the train
But some say I shouldn’t have sped up

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Lindsay Laurie

Date: 11/30/2021 2:44:00 PM

Hello Terry ... loved your set of limericks Terry. A train driver once told me that he wished trains had a steering wheel sometimes - thanks Terry - Lindsay

Terry Flood
Date: 11/30/2021 3:00:00 PM

Thanks, Lindsay. A train with a steering wheel? Now there’s a thing. Terry

Rico Leffanta

Date: 11/21/2021 10:17:00 AM

All we know for certain is that, "Do no harm" was not a charm!

Rico Leffanta
Date: 11/22/2021 10:24:00 AM

Never had any problems with NHS, which provided excellent care to the wife and children! Aloha!

Terry Flood
Date: 11/21/2021 11:59:00 AM

I’d take anyone’s word for it that they got excellent service from the NHS… but the stories I’m beginning to hear now are spine chilling. Thanks, Rico. Terry

Tom Cunningham

Date: 11/21/2021 3:01:00 AM

I was hoping it was a fictional write but I don't think it is. There's brilliant doctor's out there but sadly a few bad ones enter the mix. When you're dealing with people's health there is no place for incompetence. Tom

Terry Flood
Date: 11/21/2021 11:56:00 AM

The nature of my ‘wife’s’ ailment was such that her survival was far from assured. For two days, SILENCE. No-one answering phones, no-one calling me. They missed her meds and then modified her meds TO EXACTLY WHAT THEY ALREADY WERE and finally decided to discharge her without telling anyone. I only found out through the grapevine. For two days I literally did not know if she was in a bed or a fridge. And that’s only part if it… but I don’t want to bore you. Terry

Jan Allison

Date: 11/20/2021 4:52:00 PM

the situation in many hospitals is shocking Terry a serious subject dealt with with humour I love the sink plunger on a rope, of course knowing the story behind your poem I think you should have posted v 2 too! hugs Jan xx

Terry Flood
Date: 11/20/2021 5:09:00 PM

Thanks Jan. The other version released the steam. All that remained in this version was the train… but the doctor didn’t exactly ‘jump’ in front of it. Terry