No One's Son

Never knowing nepotism- no legacy, no love sitting awkward on an unpushed swing Creating a fantasy father in my mind Better than he who left me far behind Every day was telling, the hurt grew never less Teeming with torture, a fire inside my chest Abandonment is obscenely abusive Now attachment is extremely elusive Wounds inflicted endlessly, with no way to heal Every endeavor pursued was to impress you the father I never knew Grades were A's, made amazing plays... for that empty seat in the stands Revenge was prevailing, despite your absence Then we met, I never knew nervousness 'til this The reunion was flawed...Your intentions I saw You're placating as I clenched my fists No fatherly pride, inside I died You broke me all over again... Every Achievement undone...As I retreated self-loathing