New Life

Looking in the mirror this morning

Must have been dreaming

Of the monster

That I once was

Who is this girl

That shines before me

Do I truly know her

Does the monster still lurk behind

Those sad, pale eyes

I keep pointing my finger

At the past

At its pain

At its people

That I loved

That I hated

That left me dry

And tasted me wet

I am now a mother

And a daughter

A wife with  a will

I hide in my house

Hoping to avoid hell

Step out into the light

And see all the beauty of Earth

But it's too bright for my eyes

And the sun does not like me very much

I'm unworthy of this beauty

I don't know how to take it all in

But back to the monster

That pathetic little being

Beat up arms

Beat down soul

Eyes staring straight into death's sweet consolation

Oh, the darkness

How it longed for me

And still does

From time to time

But I can't see that monster anymore

Nor can I see its shadow

It's useless

To try to write this now

Just remember

I have no idea what I'm saying

Except that I have a new life

And some times

My old life haunts me

Saying

" Who are you?"

recovery from...memei do not know?

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