My New Years Resolution

My New Years resolution is not to make any more New Years resolutions! I've made 'em in the past but they died on the craggy shoals of the Aleutians! I'd swear to ease up on the vittles but I caught those scales lyin' to me. I tried to curb my cussin' by usin' terms like gosh, darn and golly gee! I resolved to be more courteous to other drivers and not flex my middle digit, And be more patient with my kids when they wanted to squirm and fidget! I vowed to take my dentist's advice and floss my choppers each and every day. I flossed religiously but lost my religion leavin' my teeth prone to decay! I promised myself that I'd exercise regularly in order to keep fit and trim, But preferred lollin' in my LazyBoy with a beer sans goin' to the gym! 'Tis obvious when it comes to keepin' resolutions I ain't got much fortitude, So I reckon I'll take my chances and not lock-in on any inane platitude! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (c) 2014 All Rights Reserved