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My Bawdy Valentine

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That week was the farmer’s convention Their ladies at home sought attention Twas Valentine’s night Thought I’d do alright I had quite a naughty intention The farmer’s young wife caught my eye She hid my car keys; I asked why She said, sounding flirty, “D’ya wanna get dirty? Your car keys are in the pig-sty.” I was told she’s an outrageous flirt When I told her she looked pretty hurt She said, “It’s a lie they tell because I… have got nothing on under my skirt.” I said, “Let’s have a drink and then dine.” She said, “Dry White would go down just fine.” “A Large one?” I asked She said, “Boy! You’re fast, Can you wait till I’ve finished my wine?” If I thought I was in for some fun I was shocked when my plan came undone The farmer returned My backside was burned I won’t say where he pointed his gun

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 1/31/2024 1:23:00 AM
LOL! (Do people still type LOL?) That was bloody hilarious. The second verse had me in stitches. Just tell me all this isn't true Terry...actually..tell me it is. :) Cheers - Gary
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Terry Flood
Date: 1/31/2024 10:37:00 AM
Glad you enjoyed, Gary. Deffo not true… I have an aversion to pitch forks. Terry
Date: 1/18/2024 8:52:00 AM
a hilarious tale, told in perfect limerick form! very impressive, terry...
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Terry Flood
Date: 1/18/2024 2:39:00 PM
Thanks, Ilene. I did take a wild punt that I’d get away with 5 limericks for Tania’s contest, but I always knew I was chancing my arm so withdrew it. scratching my head for a new attempt.
Date: 1/17/2024 6:21:00 PM
Car keys in the pig sty --- My, My!
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Terry Flood
Date: 1/18/2024 2:35:00 PM
I guess it proves that pigs don’t eat literally ANYTHING.
Date: 1/17/2024 4:39:00 PM
OOOOO! What a hilarious string of limericks, Terry! Hard for me to pick just one. You must've been in 'overdrive today." smiles, have a great evening, Sara
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Terry Flood
Date: 1/18/2024 2:34:00 PM
A classic case of just one more verse. Glad you enjoyed the end result. Thanks, Sara.
Date: 1/17/2024 4:20:00 PM
Deputy Terry, these are all SO very funny... but I think Tania only wants one entered. These are too good to separate them. Why don't you just write another one?
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Lin Lane
Date: 1/17/2024 6:42:00 PM
Ok. They’re all so good. I didn’t want you to get an N/A.
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Terry Flood
Date: 1/17/2024 4:29:00 PM
I was of that opinion too, Lin and was going to isolate verse four for the contest. Maybe ill do just that… unless something else pops into my head ;-)

Book: Shattered Sighs