Monoku Monday - Aug 2021

"Bits and Pieces III" Posted 1 Aug 2021 Pun Ishment bread is like the sun it rises in the yeast and it sets in the waist English Class epitome of irony when someone writes, "your an idiot" Doctor Doctor my doc: "exercise, sleep, eat well - your body will last you a lifetime" Clueless Clem, International Dating Dunce "do my jokes make you laugh, Olga?" "nyet!" "not yet? ok, I'll keep trying" Just Sayin' The misuse of literally drives me figuratively insane Quote of the Week No one goes to that restaurant anymore it's always too crowded [#6 attributed to Yogi Berra, all others found online, source unknown] "Warning - Body Humor" Posted 8 Aug 2021 These monokus were inspired by our own Jan Allison and her giggle-invoking poems that often come with the caution in the title "Warning: Bawdy Humour". Thanks for all the smiles, Jan! when i carry my child on my back i've got kid knees on my kidneys looked up "useless body parts" in the text found it in the appendix how is it that you can love more than one person with all of your heart? it takes a lot of guts to admit one needs to lose their belly fat the agony of my teenage face having pimples in my dimples admirals have naval navels mother's brothers have uncle's ankles the ball rarely touches the foot? hey U.S., let's call this sport "football"! [All humor attributed to Edmo Snord] "Bits and Pieces IV" Posted 15 Aug 2021 Pun Ishment the difference between a deer and a short witch? one's a hunted stag English Class my teacher said, "i've told you a billion times, don't use hyperbole!" I Know, Right? My friend had his entire left side amputated he's all right now News Flash today's headline: Energizer Bunny in jail, charged with battery Just Sayin' murals in restaurants are on par with the food in art museums Quote of the Week when I was a kid my parents always moved a lot but I always found them [Humor attribution: #4 by Joseph Nishimoto, #6 by Rodney Dangerfield, all others found online, sources unknown] "Bits and Pieces V" Posted 22 Aug 2021 Pun Ishment when I wake up after a troubling nightmare the rest is history Fashion Faux Pas i wanted to wear my camouflage shirt today I couldn't find it Well If You Put It That Way… a wedding: one thing in life you don't want to go off without a hitch The Yoda Quota duct tape: dark side, light side, binds the universe together... it's the force! Just Sayin' whenever you put yourself in someone else's shoes wear your own socks Quote of the Week an oxymoron walked into a bar the silence was deafening [humor attribution: #1 by Edmo Snord, #6 by Jill Thomas Doyle, all others found online, sources unknown] "Bits and Pieces VI" Posted 29 Aug 2021 Pun Ishment metal items are metallic for iron, isn't it ironic? Good Advice always have good beds and shoes if you're not in one you're in the other Clueless Clem - International Dating Dunce "another date, Helga?" "nein", she sighs. "nine? wow, you must really like me!" Things That Make You Go "Hmm" is it weird that only one company makes the game Monopoly? Just Sayn' the economy's so bad a picture's only worth 400 words Quote of the Week when I was born I was so darned ugly the doctor slapped my mother [Humor Attribution: #6 by Rodney Dangerfield, all others found online, source unknown]