Monoku-In the Summer Sun

laurel foliage languishes on the lawn - Autumn leaves its calling card

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Deneen White

Date: 8/12/2008 12:19:00 PM

Hi Brian, I love the few words, powerful punch, some times the fewer words the better, thanks for the comments on my write, take care D-nyce

Sharon Winter

Date: 8/12/2008 11:32:00 AM

Yes, I must agree with everyone else. The second line is extremely clever. Well done. Love, Shar

P Sheart

Date: 8/12/2008 9:40:00 AM

Hello Brian Really enjoyed this! The last line really gets one full of anticipation for the changing of the seasons'. We are just starting to see the first signs of fall here in Alaska so this poem feels right at home....Truly enjoyed Brian. Take care Many blessings to you and yours. Love Light Truth Patricia

Kristin Reynolds

Date: 8/12/2008 6:42:00 AM

LOVE that last line - perfect word play, and a favorite image of mine for all time, leaves on the lawn. Brilliant Monoku literally, love Kristin

Michael Degenhardt

Date: 8/12/2008 5:01:00 AM

Brian, the lines come together and make a statement of nature and strength yet subtlety as changes occur. Wonderful writing. Michael

Sean Kelly

Date: 8/12/2008 4:02:00 AM

Clever piece of alliteration and word~play , Sir Brian..... Autumn leaves !!!! very clever.....