Mom Blues

Rattle rattle rattle As I go through my own battles I look at the child in front of me Playing with his rattle so carelessly He is smiling mad rocking back and forth His hair is brown and long Yet I don't feel like I belong Who's child is this i ask? He looks like me but he doesn't feel like mine I don't know why but I am so lonely This child seems so distant from me We never bonded as far as I can tell So I still ask? Who is he? Certainly not mine He called me mama My mind races bc of this drama My mind is telling me it's true But my heart is so confused How could this be? He feels like an alien I don't want to feel like this anymore He starts to cry and roars I go over to him and see what I can do But I'm so frustrated My husband comes home and I'm so elated I don't have to spend time alone w that one Still I ask Who is this child? Certainly not mine