Miklos Radnoti Translation of the Holocaust Poem Letter To My Wife

Letter to My Wife by Miklos Radnoti translated by Michael R. Burch A poem written during the Holocaust in Lager Heidenau, in the mountains above Zagubica, August-September, 1944 Deep down in the darkness hell awaits--silent, mute. Silence screams in my ears, so I shout, but no one hears or answers, wherever they are; while sad Serbia, astounded by war, and you are so far, so incredibly distant. Still my heart encounters yours in my dreams and by day I hear yours sound in my heart again; and so I am still, even as the great mountain ferns slowly stir and murmur around me, coldly surrounding me. When will I see you? How can I know? You who were calm and weighty as a Psalm, beautiful as a shadow, more beautiful than light, the One I could always find, whether deaf, mute, blind, lie hidden now by this landscape; yet from within you flash on my sight like flickering images on film. You once seemed real but now have become a dream; you have tumbled back into the well of teenage fantasy. I jealously question whether you'll ever adore me; whether--speak!-- from youth's highest peak you will yet be my wife. I become hopeful again, as I awaken on this road where I formerly had fallen. I know now that you are my wife, my friend, my peer ... but, alas, so far! Beyond these three wild frontiers, fall returns. Will you then depart me? Yet the memory of our kisses remains clear. Now sunshine and miracles seem disconnected things. Above me I see a bomber squadron's wings. Skies that once matched your eyes' blue sheen have clouded over, and in each infernal machine the bombs writhe with their lust to dive. Despite them, somehow I remain alive. Miklós Radnóti [1909-1944], a fierce anti-fascist, was perhaps the greatest of the Holocaust poets. He was born in Budapest in 1909. In 1935 he married Fanni (Fifi) Gyarmati and wrote his Cartes Postales (Postcards from France); these poetic "snapshots" were precursors to his darker images of war, Razglednicas (Picture Postcards). In 1944 he was deported to a compulsory labor camp near Bor, Yugoslavia. As the Nazis retreated from the approaching Russians, the Bor camp was evacuated. During what became his death march, Radnóti recorded images of what he saw and experienced. The weakened poet was shot to death along with 21 other prisoners who were unable to walk. Their mass grave was exhumed after the war and Radnóti's poems were found on his body by his wife, inscribed in pencil in a small Serbian exercise book.