Memories and Tears

There are photos of our childhood
                          Our long ago sweet neighborhood      
                              And  your  golden angel face
                               Another time, another place   

                       You were my cousin, but brother to me
                          Living with us till I was nearly three
                               You were over five years old
                             An angelic smile of purest gold
                
                          How could our hearts differentiate
                         And how this would affect your fate
                       When your dad married someone new
                       Your heart was torn, and ours was too
                  
                              Quite suddenly, miles apart
                          Breaking  all us children's  hearts
                           Part of us six, was all you knew
                      Then an only child, in a new town too
                
                       You were our cousin, but our brother
                     You suddenly had a brand new mother
                          We cried for us, we cried for you
                            It was a shock, it felt untrue
                   
                        Memories, of you and all our joys
                       You'd given me some of your toys
                       And I remembered how we'd play
                       When all was well,  day after day
             
                    How could we not take it for granted
                   How could we know the future slanted
             Visits slowed, and stopped, then came our teens
                          Seven years were in between
                       
                                   December 1975, 
                     We finally took that long, long drive
                       It was so good to see your face!
                     My brother dear past time & space.
           
                    But then you vanished without a trace
                
                         Thirty-seven years....I prayed
                    All those years I'd wished you stayed
                       My big brother as once I'd known
                    And in our home you could have grown
           
                    Finally, you came back with your wife
                      I thought we had you back for life.
                     You'd been broken in younger years,
                  She'd helped you dry some of those tears.
               
                             Then you left permanently
                                   Do you hear me?
                                     Can you see?
                           The horror, tears and misery?
          
                            Now the pain can never heal.
                                 The liar came to steal
                                          And kill
                          Why did you let him do his will?
             
                        There are photos of our childhood
                        Our long ago sweet neighborhood      
                            Of your  golden angel face
                           Another time, another place    
         
                    They cannot dry these heart felt tears
               Though you've been gone these seven years
                    The tears can never fully be dried
                    My cousin, since the day you died
                           
                      Can you hear me? Do you see?
                      Love lives past earth's boundaries
                      How I've longed to see your face!
                     My brother, past this time & space.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2021

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Kendrick Avatar
November 16, 2025 at 11:16 AM
I can't imagine how painful that was. You were attached but apparently, he moved on and made another life for himself or because of what happened to him, he could not make deep and permanent relationships. Deep down in his being he probably had the fear that if he got close that person would be snatched away. Thank you for sharing. Sara K
Legros Kelley Avatar
November 16, 2025 at 5:34 PM
It has been one of those unhealing wounds that really affected him, as well as me. He had been a part of our family, and he never bonded with his stepmom, He was blessed with a beautiful wife, and a son, I never met his son because he disappeared from our lives again for years. He and she had got back in contact in our fifties, had not seen him since he was 19 and I was 16, I missed him so much all those years, He battled depression most of his life, and after my mom died, less than a year passed when he took his life. I know he always hoped my mother would take him back as her own, she was the only mom he'd known as a young child. I have my theories on this, our childhood was upturned and we never really healed totally.
Macfarlane Avatar
April 23, 2022 at 8:10 AM
If only he would have been allowed to remain as your brother in your family, things may have been different for all of you. My heart hurt reading this heartbreaking write. You captured so many emotions. Well written from the heart. Hugs
Legros Kelley Avatar
April 24, 2022 at 10:47 PM
Thank you for your visit and for your kind words. He is precious, and we will always love him and miss him. I can only hope and pray that if anyone else is fighting the horrible battle of depression, that they choose to stay. It is a terrible battle, a horrible malady, but the pain only explodes into others lives. If only he could have held on, he could have survived to another happy day between the islands of pain. I would beg others not to take the exit he did. The song on my most recent poem I wrote about him, 'No one can Replace You' really says it all. Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting <3 ~BJ
Pandit Avatar
March 7, 2022 at 2:33 PM
I am glad I sopped by to read this poem, after you mentioned it in your recent poem. This is heartfelt and brings tears--you so loved him like a brother and his parting is a big, big loss for you. This poem is as much about you my friend--it tolls from your endearing heart.
Legros Kelley Avatar
March 8, 2022 at 12:18 PM
It also speaks so much of him. Our hearts were broken when we were young. My big sister who, when she learned he would no longer live with us was only a couple of years older than him, and she too was devastated. He was very precious. Thank you for your visit, Vijay, I really appreciate your friendship and love. God bless you <3 ~BJ
Laurie Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 6:16 PM
Hello BJ … a sad verse in many aspects. Being pulled apart and then slain makes this a very sad tale indeed - thank you BJ - Lindsay
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 11:01 PM
Thank you for stopping by with your kind heartfelt words. There is simply nothing on this earth that can take the pain away in his loss, he sort of died of heart failure, the failure to believe in a future of his own worth and being. But he is so loved. Somehow, just acknowledging him in this poem helps me, in some small way. Thank you, your heart felt comment is so appreciated. <3
May Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 3:37 PM
A heartbreaking tale of loss, and the agony that comes with it, Well penned
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 11:39 PM
Thank you Joseph for stopping by and for your kind words of empathy. I haven't been able to talk much about this loss, it hurts so very much. He is greatly loved, and greatly missed.
Andresen Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 2:54 PM
- Sometimes we can find comfort and strength in the written words of others, but the longing will always be there - A heartbreaking poem, BJ - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 29, 2021 at 11:41 PM
Thank you Anna-Lise, for stopping by with your sweet words. I was able to finally pen my heart in this loss, though even then, I almost deleted the poem after I wrote it. I only hope others burdened with hurting lives choose to grasp hands of any reaching out to them, and choose to journey on in hope and life. Beyond that, there is absolute heartbreak for those left to grapple with the loss. Thank you for stopping by <3
Mcintosh Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 6:36 PM
This is definitely a fave for me... such a tragic yet brilliant write from your heart. I absolutely love it. God bless you and comfort you always, Love, Gina
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 9:17 PM
Thank you so much Gina, your words mean so much to me. God bless you too <3 ~BJ
Turner Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 12:55 PM
A very emotive write, BJ. Those we love always live on in our memories. It can be both a blessing and a curse, depending on the moment.
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 3:39 PM
Yes, that is true. His death was so premature, it left a lot of heart break. His life was really broken during childhood and left deep scars on him. I cherish his memory of the good days we had together. The sweeping sorrow that still hits usually comes with a glance of a photograph or a memory trigger such as an old song. It was hard to write this poem, a lot of tears. ~BJ
Balasubramanian Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 6:00 AM
An heart touching write. We always miss those who die till we are alive. May God bless youwith peace. Have a wonderful day ahead friend
Legros Kelley Avatar
June 27, 2021 at 3:27 PM
Sometimes it hits, with a relic of memory, and the sadness sweeps through. Thank you for your sweet comment Rama, I hope you have a beautiful day as well <3 ~BJ
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace