Melons Mabel

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*A very loose form of Limerick, 
          but Mabel deserves lots of syllables.


There once was a waitress with the name of Mabel
Who used her bosom as a restaurant table
Beneath her double chins
Mabel flaunted her twins
The one on the right, Cain and the left one, Abel

The locals knew not to make fun of the lady
Ol' Teddy swaggered in, looking kinda shady
He taunted her with smut
She punched him in the gut
That's the last we all saw of Teddy O'Grady

Mabel looked real nice in her crimson ruffled gown
Two cups of coffee; 'pon her boobs she set 'em down
And when I smiled at her
She said, "Thank you, sir"
I left her a satisfied tip of a half-crown

When eating lunch, Mabel never uses a plate
Don't insult her by declaring she's overweight
Cause she'll call you a lout
Chew you up, spit you out
If you tell her she needs a train to move her freight

Mabel's knockers would put the Grand Tetons to shame
But they're the reason she's in the town's Hall of Fame
She wins beauty contests
With her grandiose breasts
I think 'Melons Mabel' is a comely nickname

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024



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Date: 2/10/2024 6:49:00 AM
Oh my, those are awesome limericks Lin! I needed the smile, thank you! Love the pic, it really adds.
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Date: 2/9/2024 3:37:00 PM
Ooh er, Missus! What bountiful bunch of limericks. Put me in mind of the Carry On films. Great fun and much enjoyed. Terry
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Date: 2/9/2024 4:55:00 AM
Hehe…Absolutely love this very funny poem Lin!! So well done my friend! Debx
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/9/2024 6:24:00 AM
Thanks a lot, Deb. I don't think she'll be working at Jan's saloon any time soon, but there may be someone who'll join you.
Date: 2/8/2024 4:13:00 PM
Lin, ha ha, love your limericks and the pic too. Mable has some talent.
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/9/2024 6:23:00 AM
She can hold those cups there, but what happens when she walks with hot tea or coffee? Ha... Thanks, Tania.
Date: 2/8/2024 1:57:00 PM
A laugh a line Lin, love the Limericks, who needs a table when one’s got boobs big as Mable’s… Beryl
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/9/2024 6:21:00 AM
Thanks so much, Belle. Ha, I think I'll opt for a table.
Date: 2/8/2024 12:37:00 PM
I enjoyed reading your way toooooo funny/creative Limerick write/story/fun picture. Thanks for the laugh.....  Have a wonderful day..........................
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/9/2024 6:21:00 AM
Thanks, Paula. Good day to you, too.
Date: 2/8/2024 10:22:00 AM
Hilarious, Lin! And to think Mabel was a real person. She certainly knew how to use her size G or H assets to their "full" advantage! So fun! Thanks for the tickle! Blessings!
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/8/2024 12:11:00 PM
Hi Sam. Thanks for appreciating the humor and Mabel’s ‘ta tas’
Date: 2/8/2024 10:04:00 AM
Lol Lin, well she certainly put her assets to good use. Tom
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/8/2024 10:19:00 AM
Hmmmm Tom. I haven’t seen a view of her backside. ;-)
Date: 2/8/2024 7:55:00 AM
Dear Lin, LOL Your poem is a delightful read! The character of Mabel is brought to life through your words. You’ve managed to bring humor, great imagery, and a touch of the unexpected into your verses, making for a truly engaging piece. I particularly enjoyed the clever wordplay and the bold, unapologetic portrayal of Mabel. Keep up the great work, and continue to let your creativity shine! - Blessings, Daniel
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/8/2024 8:02:00 AM
She has the look that says, "I don't care what you think of me. I'm a confidant woman!" I am so delighted you enjoyed my verses, Daniel. Sometimes, I'm not sure if I should post things like this, but then I think as Mabel does... I'm a confidant woman and hope many poets will find something to like in what I write. Thanks!
Date: 2/8/2024 7:28:00 AM
Lin, OMG, I need this chuckle today! Mabel flaunted her twins!!! my favorite line. Terrific story Limerick!! Happy Thursday xxoo
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Lin Lane
Date: 2/8/2024 7:36:00 AM
Morning, Mike. Glad she made you chuckle. Thanks.
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