Bj Fard Poet Free verse

Martyrdom of a Jew King

My name is Judas
betrayer of God
everyone hates me
yet thats not as much
as I hate myself
and everything else
until its just a word
that cannot be felt

I can't be accountable
to a single action
thats unchangeable
I wish you would cast off
into a river of ashes
and cover your body
until the sorrow passes
thats what I did
to slowly admit
I'm no longer the devil
you wish to possess
I buried my burdens
deep in demons of past

My sin seems to leave me
quick as I forget it
for you I've become
a dead doll submissive
I sold the jew king
for a mere thirty silver
he then became a martyr
who would have figured
I guess I delivered
the greatest good ever
so you may understand why
my guilt is light as a feather

Judas, you coward
backstabber. you dog
I acknowledge it all now
with a wink and a nod
people mean little 
more than they care for themselves
you wouldn't take coin
if your family were starved?
you won't hear my reason
then I won't give you no sense
I've already given you more
than I ever truly meant
more than I'm worth
or have had to give
Judas, the sinner
the liar, the pig
Judas the desperate
for his family to live
Judas, the hero
for without him
dies his religion

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