Jan Allison | + Follow Poet |
Limerick | + Fav Poem | Comment | Email | Print |

Mammo-Grahams

On Thursday my boobies will get squashed
(My armpits will be thoroughly washed)
Can’t use deo or spray
so I’ll whiff on that day
Mammograms show cancer can be quashed

Always makes me smile that my appointment letter comes from Bristol because in cockney rhyming slang ‘Bristols’ is slang for breasts.

9/19/18

Copyright © Jan Allison | Year Posted 2018

Please Login to post a comment

Kim Rodrigues Date: 12/4/2018 4:27:00 PM Just had mine and this one was second worst. The first being the time I got pinched and bruised. This lady wanted to handle the boob that was loose. I’m like: I’ve got this one....lol Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:37:00 PM Hope the results are negative Kim, they are a necessary evil. When I had my lump at the end of last year I had 11 mammograms in a day, believe me I never want to go through that again:-( hugs jan xx

Duke Beaufort Date: 9/30/2018 8:02:00 PM Yes. My wife speaks of these moments with displeasure. At least you bring a humorous perspective. Thanks. Jan are you in England? I can’t remember. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:35:00 PM When your wife tells you how bad they are just imagine your bits trapped in a vice and you get the idea what its like lol, yes I'm in the Uk ( Isle of Man) which is a crown dependency:-) hugs jan xx

Gershon Wolf Date: 9/27/2018 8:32:00 PM Women should come up with a 'Man-o-gram.' Why? ---Just because... :) gw Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:33:00 PM I am sure they would love to invent a machine so blokes know just how painful having ones bits squashed really is!:-) hugs Jan xx

Pashang Salehi Date: 9/27/2018 12:19:00 AM Hoe everything went well... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:33:00 PM Thanks so much for the comment so sorry i missed replying before, yes everything was a ok Pashang:-) :-) hugs Jan xx

Lindsay Laurie Date: 9/26/2018 7:39:00 PM Well Jan … by the photo, they certainly do get squashed. How do you revive 'em? As a bloke I wouldn't know - thanks Jan - Lindsay Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:32:00 PM Thanks so much for the comment so sorry i missed replying before and I better not answer your comment its a family site lol:-( hugs Jan xx

Mahtab Bangalee Date: 9/23/2018 4:46:00 AM lovely and funny written- Mammograms show cancer can be quashed Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 12/4/2018 4:31:00 PM Thanks so much for the comment so sorry i missed replying before:-( hugs Jan xx

Viv Wigley Date: 9/22/2018 1:26:00 AM I'm sort of glad they don't do similar to us men and our goolies, Jan, that would be eye watering. Hope all goes well. Viv x Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/22/2018 6:40:00 AM I'm convinced a bloke invented the machine lol:-) hugs jan xx

Rico Leffanta Date: 9/21/2018 2:17:00 PM If I were Plastic Man, I would happily volunteer to warm them up for you before the frigid slab. The validation code for my comment is "NUD", so it seems poetry soup.com got the message. Bonne chance! Aloha! Rico n.b. I notice you still haven't commented on my, "Jan's gift to the world" …... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/21/2018 3:44:00 PM I've just dropped by Rico and faved the poem thank you so much:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich Date: 9/20/2018 6:24:00 PM funny illustration and clever Lim, Jan. I bet you are glad it's over with! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/21/2018 3:40:00 PM just got to wait 2 weeks for the results but yeah i'm glad its over - and they only did 4 not 11 like last time:-) hugs jan xx

Charlie Smith Date: 9/20/2018 1:35:00 PM Where did you get that picture? Funny stuff... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/21/2018 3:36:00 PM found it on the web when I wrote another poem on the same subject and just had to use it again:-) hugs Jan xx

Ralph Sergi Date: 9/20/2018 9:41:00 AM Hi Allison: I'm glad i'm a guy! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/21/2018 2:54:00 PM Im sure the machine was invented by a man - they don't use such a device to check a man's 'bits' lol!:-( hugs jan xx

Tania Kitchin Date: 9/20/2018 4:48:00 AM Ha ha, funny and no one likes to have them squashed but something we have to do! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/21/2018 2:53:00 PM I hate having them and had my fair share at the end of last year when I had a lump - 11 in one day was no fun!! but thankfully yesterday was only 4 so it wasn't too bad:-) hugs jan xx

Connie Marcum Wong Date: 9/19/2018 1:40:00 PM Loved your note about Bristol...didn't know that! I use themogram instead of the torturous mamogram. Where do you find such pictures? Hilarious! : ) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/19/2018 7:08:00 PM I wish we had the thermal imaging, I did ask about it and they said if they had it and they found anything they would still have to use the mammogram machine - sheer torture but it won't be for too long I hope:-) I used the pic on another poem and it makes me smile so i used it for this one too:-) hugs jan xx

Caren Krutsinger Date: 9/19/2018 10:02:00 AM Oh, yes, you have portrayed this in the nicest, most pleasant of ways. The words I was looking for was ICE COLD HARD platform. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/19/2018 7:04:00 PM The least they could do is they could warm it up a little Caren!:-) hugs jan xx

Ilene Bauer Date: 9/19/2018 9:10:00 AM ha! i can sure relate to this one, jan! the accompanying picture is hilarious, too... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/19/2018 7:04:00 PM I used the pic on another poem about mammograms - it just makes me smile when i see it :-) hugs jan xx

Tom Cunningham Date: 9/19/2018 8:01:00 AM LOL Jan your'e back. On a serious note , hope all goes well. Tom Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/19/2018 7:03:00 PM It can't be worse than the lump and surgery I had earlier this year lol:-) hugs jan xx

Maureen McGreavy Pigeon Tart Date: 9/19/2018 7:28:00 AM Lol! GOLD Good luck Lovely <3 xomo! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 9/19/2018 7:03:00 PM thanks Mo:-) hugs jan xx