When Officer Buck Stedler saw the man
in the shadows of a soot-stained alley,
he was standing tall, and in his right hand,
was a knife, gore-encrusted and bloody.
Below him a woman was sprawled out,
motionless, into space dead eyes gazed,
what had happened there was plain to Stedler,
she’d been assaulted, been murdered, been raped.
Stedler pulled out his pistol and took aim
at the object of so many fears,
a serial killed who stared at him,
his dull face a swollen mask of tears.
The fact that this butcher was crying
gave the good Officer Stedler pause,
then he looked back to the poor girl lying,
said,”On you knees in the name of the law!”
The killer then threw the knife away,
but he would make no attempt to kneel,
he looked to Stedler, said in a whisper:
“You do not know how this all makes me feel.”
Stedler roared,”I do not give a damn!
Get down now or I’ll fill you with lead.”
The killer sighed,”You must understand
that there is something quite wrong in my head.
“It starts as just a few dark, passing thoughts,
the kinds most people have and ignore.
They go against everything I was taught,
but they will slowly build up, more and more.
“Until they take up a space in my mind,
at this point I cannot drive them out,
the urges taking up more of my time,
pounding through my brain, hot and loud.
“Every single time I do my best
to hold back these perverse desires,
until it feels like a chain on my chest,
and my nerves are a billowing fire.
“The conscience then, it takes a backseat,
it’s influence lesser and lesser.
I cry out, but yet, I still need relief
to bleed of the ever-growing pressure.
“Like an unscratched itch, it just keeps growing,
and though sometimes I hold out quite long,
it overwhelms, and I go out knowing
that the pleasures death brings me are wrong.
“All of my reason that screams out to quit,
is removed, is locked up, forced to watch.
Its there even now, disgusted by this,
while the urge celebrates another notch.
“And to see them helpless beneath my blade…
to feel the last hopes drain out of them,
it’s all that can make the endless itch fade,
and I know that I must do this again.
“Something in me was not made correct,
and there’s no solution I can figure.
Officer, please, you know what to do next,
for the love of God, pull the damn trigger.”
Stedler’s mind reeled, but the gun stayed steady,
the monster never leaving his vision,
he glanced at the girl, then he was ready,
and with a deep breath, made his decision…
Copyright © David Welch | Year Posted 2018