Loud quiet

I am wildly conscious of the fact I don’t know how to speak up anymore. I feel like I’m yelling and no one can Hear me I was told to shut up, then told to Speak up I enunciate so much, maybe it’ll be enough. I’ll repeat myself like I can’t hear the voices of those Who convinced me I was always going to be too much. I can hear every sentence at once I can see them behind you I can feel every breath, a condensation down my throat A condemnation of a pond and I am the boat. I promise I’m trying, opening my mouth There’s air coming out, but I can’t hear anything Over the people fighting over the volume of my voice Strike a cord with my cords, I didn’t think they needed tuning. I’ll repeat myself like I can’t hear their voices and if I speak in lowercase, maybe they’ll think I’m less than too much.