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Lost

Amid the fire of twilight sun
I wish I knew my way
horizon’s char and moonlight’s shun
has ashed my hope   I pray

for dark cloud constellation to free
a cosmic steed for me to flee gunshot streets
for primrose to steal my yellow jaundice
and burn the itch with incense of roadside stars

for me to follow  scent and sight 
and find forsaken door
to open with my key contrite
a waif who’s lost no more

but gods of dirt and sky refuse
this pessimist with optimist dreams
side-of-road primrose mowed as needle holes
grow my nebulae-scars of blown-vein bruises

a morphine horse runs dirty track 
while stars in alley air
just stare and offer not but black
expanse    —my nowhere lair

Copyright © Susan Ashley | Year Posted 2025

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CayCay Jennings Date: 7/25/2025 11:40:00 PM I'm lost, couldn't find a lost contest pending or finalized, I'll look again but someone may need to look for me! Anyway, I love the libra line, we are optimistic pessimist, indeed. BEAUTIFUL. I am so glad a contest led to the birth of this poem. I've wanted to visit your poems for a long time but both life and Soup bounce me around at whim despite any procedural plan I may have. Enjoyed my time with your writes very much. You are a true poet - The Real Deal. Poetry hugs ... CayCay Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/30/2025 10:47:00 AM Dear CayCay, it's so wonderful to see you! I'm thrilled to receive your gracious visit and wonderful thoughts. I'm humbled and honored, my poet friend. Thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. The contest was judged yesterday 7/29/25. You can find the finalized list on the contest results page. Indeed, the contest theme did give rise to this poem, so I have Craig to thank for the inspiration. Will visit your beautiful pages soon. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Reason A. Poteet Date: 7/15/2025 9:18:00 AM your contrat twixt pessimist and optimist is well-done, clear to the reader. Well-written Susan with flair and precision. I enjoyed it despite the dark theme. So current to the times and the theme -LOST. Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/18/2025 7:38:00 AM Dear Reason, it's wonderful to see you! I'm appreciative and gratified to receive your insightful and inspiring comments. Thank you for sharing in the imagery and emotion of this poem with me. Indeed, many are lost in these current times. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Eileen Manassian Date: 7/14/2025 7:49:00 AM This pessimist with optimist dreams.. pure gold that phrase. Loved it. One wishes that she would have those dreams fulfilled and find salvation from her addiction. You have a wonderful way with words. Thank you for your kind visit to my page. Blessings Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/18/2025 7:35:00 AM Dear Eileen, it's so wonderful to have your creative presence gracing my poem, and the pages of PS, once again. When your poetic pen and presence goes quiet here, your soulful voice is missed. I know your circumstances have been arduous and my thoughts, and the thoughts of many here, are with you. Thank you for sharing in the imagery and emotion of this poem with me. I'm gratified to be so uplifted by your thoughts. Warmest wishes, my poet friend.. ~Susan

Jack Horne Date: 7/12/2025 10:52:00 AM just love this powerful write, my friend - as always, so beautifully expressed Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/13/2025 9:19:00 AM Dear Jack, my long lost poet friend, it's wonderful to see you! I'm gratified to receive your uplifting comments, so glad your found this humble offering to be "powerful". I was hoping it would come across in that way. Thank you, for your gracious visit and for sharing your meaningful thoughts with me. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Hilda Greenhough Date: 7/6/2025 7:47:00 PM Terrific poem. Apathy and expectation seem to combine as friends in search of a solution. Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/7/2025 11:18:00 AM Dear Hilda, your response to my poem leaves me feeling gratified. Thank you for sharing your treasured thoughts with me. Warmest wishes, my poet friend.. ~Susan

Paige Hind Date: 7/6/2025 5:30:00 PM This has so haunting imagery. I love the reference to a horse in the skies. A breathless read from me - :) Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/7/2025 11:17:00 AM Dear Paige, I'm so happy to know you enjoyed my poem. Thank you for sharing in the imagery of this poem with me. Your inspiring thoughts are treasured. Warmest wishes, my poet friend.. ~Susan

Arthur Vaso Date: 7/6/2025 12:36:00 AM Loved how you did this! Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/6/2025 6:56:00 AM Dear Arthur, thank you for your gracious visit and and uplifting words. Truly appreciated. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Deb M Date: 7/5/2025 9:36:00 PM Susan l read this captivating write a few times and my understanding is that this is about a girl lost in the world of drugs....and when she opens that forsaken door she is lost no more and as she gets a hit of heroin or whatever her drug is! The way you write and your amazing imagery really draws me in and always makes me think! I've probably got it all wrong haha!! Debx Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/6/2025 7:26:00 AM Dear Deb, it's so wonderful see you! Thank you for your lovely visit and for your insightful comments. Indeed, this poem is about opiate abuse, and the speaker's struggle, both emotionally/physically, with addiction and hopelessness Though she dares to hope that she will find her way 'home' (the forsaken door) to find forgiveness and acceptance and healing once again... essentially, to be 'lost' no more. Your perceptive poet's heart got it all right! :) Thank you for letting my poem get into your thoughts, your precious thoughts are truly appreciated. Warmest wishes, my poet friend.. ~Susan

Tom Woody Date: 7/5/2025 12:47:00 PM "Nowhere man, please listen. You don't know what you're missin'. Nowhere man, the world is at your command." Anyway, that's what blew into my feeble brain when I read this gem (hey, Beatles comparisons are never bad, right?). A morphine horse puts me in mind of heroin and the emptiness that leads to nowhere and nothing of any substance. I'm sure I have it all wrong but Craig will love it. We do too Login to Reply Tom Woody Date: 7/6/2025 10:01:00 AM :) Susan Ashley Date: 7/6/2025 7:15:00 AM Dear Tom, I appreciate you connecting the Beatles "Nowhere Man" gem to my humble offering through the word "nowhere".. they are similar in that both pieces depict a speaker who feels a sense of 'disconnection', but where "Nowhere Man" searches for purpose and clarity, the speaker in "Lost" is searching for escape from internal and physical struggle and addiction. But hey, I'll take my poem being mentioned in the same vein (no pun intended..) as the Beatles anytime:) You have it right with your understanding of the 'morphine horse' and "the emptiness that leads to nowhere and nothing".. the poem is about the speaker's struggle with opiate addiction and the hope to find their way 'home' again. I hope you're equally correct about Craig loving it, lol! Warmest wishes and thank you, my insightful poet friend.. ~Susan

Paula Goldsmith Date: 7/5/2025 11:02:00 AM I enjoyed reading your "Lost" write/story. Great Ending... "Good Luck" Have a blessed/wonderful day writing away......... Login to Reply Susan Ashley Date: 7/5/2025 11:05:00 AM Dear Paula, thank you for your gracious visit and for the "good luck". I'm so glad to know you enjoyed my poem. It's wonderful to see you, my poet friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan