Helen J Radford Poet Free verse

Letting Go

I want to relinquish this stagnant pain. 
It has been lurking in my subconsciousness 
and perforating my reality for too long. 

I try to extricate myself from this servitude 
but it sticks to my fingers like resin 
whenever I try to discard it.  Clinging to my memory 

like a limpet to a rock: embedded in my remembrance, 
and etched into my history.  Niggling, annoying, 
irritating, like a loudly-ticking clock. 

I want to assuage myself of this recollection. 
I have served my penance and paid my dues. 
I try to escape this quagmire, but my shoes 

capitulate to the quicksand, dragging, dislocating 
me from the solid ground of familiarity -plunging me 
into the slavery of remembering once more. 

Let me relinquish this putrid pain. 
It is disabling my forward motion. 
I am trapped in the quondam of a past life. 

Let me go!  Let me let it go! 
Stop calling me.  I won't answer. 
I can't hear you.  I won't listen.  Go away!......... 

Oh blissful silence!  Peace from the demolition 
of future's construction. I look behind, one last time, 
but the ashes of hated memoirs dissipate in my view. 

Looking forward now, steps gathering momentum. 
Safe from the past, and welcomed by expectation. 
Free at last, sure footed in my pursuit of happiness

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