Legandary - For: Your Favourite Legend Contest

A chronological anthology Of legends, folk lore and mythology There’s no one called Eric Or Ethel or Derek For which I shall make no apology Samson just got himself sheared Delilah had cut off his beard She cut off his hair Then headed ‘down there’ And cut off far more than he’d feared The Romans detested Boudicca She never would be a boot licker That feared Celtic lass Stuck a spear up their a.s.s And that made them march a bit quicker According to legend and fable Merlin was slightly unstable His spell came apart So ‘a wheel for a cart’ Turned into a bloody great table In years gone by Lady Godiva Had no car... she wasn't a driver No licence of course But show her a horse She'd whip off her kit for a fiver Robin Hood’s men were all merry They'd guzzled a flagon of Sherry With Marion pissed Young Robin got kissed And then they got all missionary A fella who’s called Calvin Klein Is a legend in his own time Those rich city slickers Wear Calvin Klein knickers But wouldn't be seen dead in mine But stand aside Canute and Midas For legends still amble beside us Not witch nor soothsayer Nor some Dragon slayer But mortals who get rid of Spiders Perchance it’s your husband or wife Who acts without sabre or knife They might be an Eric Or Ethel or Derek... (And might be in fear of their life). Contest: Your favourite legend Sponsor: Chantelle Anne Cooke 27 February 2020