Last Journal Entry- My Gay Friend, Paul
Slowly drifting, drifting away, and it feel likes I’m drowning.
I'm drowning, my eyes are drowning every time they surf into the world of pleasure,
Seas and seas of bodies creating electricity yet God hasn’t struck me for such sin,
Come closer, Come closer, I freeze as I lose my soul to the enemy, the screen, the bodies I’ve never touched,
This encounter leaves me feeling so ashamed and afraid.
What if they know?
Would they think I’ve changed my nationality?
Would they now think I live in a country of red ,orange, yellow, green, blue, violet.
Heal me, but every time I receive the baptism, I progress into a another stage of sickness,
I envision myself, my body, that I see in such high regard, hanging highly from the ropes of betrayal,
They made me thought that it was okay
Is that you last words? God looked at me as he was ready to pass his judgement.
Yes father,
And my body transformed into the place I belong,
A sea of fire,
And this time I wasn’t sure how to swim, and as I take my last breath and reminisce, I realized I've been here all along, it didn’t burn this bad, maybe because the world leaves you to believe that you have a thick skin and no heart.
I was born sick, I don’t love it, command me to be well.
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