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Just Desserts

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Submitted to Richard's Beginnings Matter Contest - It had taken a month of badgering by my friend jenny Brewer to even pluck up courage to post my poems - I wondered how my humour would be appreciated!
~awarded 2nd place~

Listen to poem:

I was at my favorite restaurant and I'd had a lovely meal, if I finished all my food then a pudding was the deal I’d relished every morsel and was pleased as a Cheshire cat, the dessert menu was on its way, oh I couldn’t wait for that The waitress brought the menus, I rubbed my hands with glee, oh sticky toffee pudding, now that’s the one for me She came to take the order – we had waited as you do, turning to me she said ‘now Madam, what can I get you’ Oh stiffy cockie pudding please was my swift reply - I didn’t realize what I’d said till I saw tears form in her eye. I went as red as a beetroot and the others began to laugh, at my spoonerism which turned into a complete gaffe The pudding it came quickly but I couldn’t wait to leave, I choked on every mouthful, how my stomach it did heave So please take notice of my error on this horrendous day, if you order sticky toffee pudding be careful what you say! A true story! written on 2/2/2014 submitted on 08/03/21 to YOUR PERSONAL FAVORITE Poetry Contest Sponsored by L MILTON HANKINS

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James Peranteau

Date: 4/1/2024 5:53:00 PM

you are The quintessential story teller dear poet! again...though so belated (((((claps)))))ty much love ')

James Peranteau
Date: 4/2/2024 4:35:00 AM

the accolades must have cauzed your goose's tuh bump ;) I'm thankful to have bumped into your assstutch; oh my, exuze me...astute Jan...ty ')

Jan Allison
Date: 4/2/2024 1:50:00 AM

This is the first poem in my humour book, it is my all time favourite. i recited it on stage in front of 600 people including my mum lol - not bad for someone who had never been on stage before and a total novice to poetry until 2013! hugs jan xx

Gershon Wolf

Date: 2/28/2024 8:19:00 PM

Thought I'd check out your very first poem on the soup tonight, Jan. It sure is you, alright. lol. Keep us in stitches, please -- the kind the doctor doesn't use...

Jan Allison
Date: 4/2/2024 1:50:00 AM

Thanks GW:-) hugs Jan xx

James Horn

Date: 1/27/2024 5:19:00 PM

Is that cockney? Have missed you over the years, Looks like 2016 was a great year for us. Jim Horn

Jan Allison
Date: 4/2/2024 1:51:00 AM

Thanks James, sorry for the late reply I am not on soup much but working on my 2nd humour book:-) hugs Jan xx

Jeff Connelly

Date: 8/20/2023 7:35:00 AM

Lololol Jan... This poem is absolutely hilarious as well as simply brilliant!!!

Ironic Zink

Date: 3/14/2022 3:09:00 AM

Still my favorite!

Regina Mcintosh

Date: 9/24/2021 3:05:00 PM

I love this, Jan... so hilarious! God bless you sweet friend,. love, Gina

John Watt

Date: 8/5/2021 10:17:00 AM

Jan, always love reading this "pun foem" and re-living with you the horror of the moment that you are now able to laugh about. It's a good thing you didn't also try to order "pop corn"! Hugs ~ smart feller

Tom Cunningham

Date: 8/5/2021 3:10:00 AM

Lol loved this one Jan, what makes it funnier is the fact its based on a true story. Bet you wanted the floor to open. Congrats on your win. Tom. You sound very posh.

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 8/4/2021 3:10:00 PM

Back with Congratulations on this win. Keep a smile going. Have a great/blessed day................

Beryl Edmonds

Date: 8/4/2021 2:01:00 PM

Jan, I love this poem, read it before and often think of it if I go out with the girls and it’s on the menu. Congratulations on your placement in Milton’s contest… Belle

Garima Dubey

Date: 8/4/2021 12:55:00 PM

This was quite hilarious Jan and you have a very sweet voice^_^

Susan Ashley

Date: 8/4/2021 11:26:00 AM

Dear Jan, it is a delight to return and partake of this exquisite hilarity once again. Congratulations for your excellent win in Milton's contest with this amazing, engaging, LOL piece. Warmest wishes and hugs.. ~Susan

Sam Kauffman

Date: 8/4/2021 10:59:00 AM

Absolutely hilarious Jan! I'm so so sorry your verbal slip left such a bad taste in your mouth and ruined your desert! But, that being said your poem has left a delicious smile on my face and a giggle on my lips. Congrats, kudos and high fives foryour win!

Jan Allison
Date: 8/4/2021 11:21:00 AM

My friends still tease me every time we go out lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y.

Date: 8/4/2021 10:25:00 AM

Hi Jan, Congratulations on your win. Have a great day:-) Alexis

Jan Allison
Date: 8/4/2021 11:20:00 AM

Thanks Alexis and thanks for the mail too:-) hugs Jan xx

L Milton Hankins

Date: 8/4/2021 9:09:00 AM

Jan, I loved this poem which I originally read it, but I had forgotten who wrote it. Shame on me! I was pleased to see and read it again. Good writing. Congratulations on your placement in my contest.

L Milton Hankins
Date: 8/4/2021 12:20:00 PM

I love your sense of humor. Good write.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/4/2021 11:20:00 AM

Thanks Milton I was unsure if you would like the humour for your contest but it is my # 1 favourite and always will be:-) hugs Jan xx

Dale Gregory Cozart

Date: 8/4/2021 9:00:00 AM

Hilarious!! Congrats.

Jan Allison
Date: 8/4/2021 11:19:00 AM

Thanks Dale!:-) hugs Jan xx

Susan Ashley

Date: 6/3/2021 6:44:00 PM

Dear Jan, back with congrats for your wonderful win in Juliet's contest with this splendid and ohh soo funny poem. It was a delight to experience your hysterical faux pas once again. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Jan Allison
Date: 8/4/2021 11:19:00 AM

thanks Susan it will always be my all time favourite poem!:-) hugs Jan xx

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 5/24/2021 9:21:00 AM

Congratulations on your win. What a cute/fun write. Thanks for giving me a much needed laugh. Have a blessed day/week................

Jan Allison
Date: 5/24/2021 11:40:00 AM

Thanks Paula despite recent negativity aimed at me by certain people on soup I will never stop trying to raise a smile:-) hugs jan xx

Juliet Ligon

Date: 5/23/2021 7:07:00 PM

Thanks for entering your original poem, Jan. Your poem was fun to read. This was a difficult contest to judge. Keep up the creativity.

Juliet Ligon
Date: 5/25/2021 8:32:00 AM

Oh wow, that's quite the honor!

Jan Allison
Date: 5/24/2021 11:39:00 AM

Thanks Juliet, i recited this poem in front of over 600 people at a charity event, it will always be my favourite poem for so many reasons:-) hugs Jan xx

Marilene Evans

Date: 5/23/2021 2:12:00 PM

A cute one. Congratulations!

Jan Allison
Date: 5/23/2021 3:00:00 PM

my fave ever poem lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Beryl Edmonds

Date: 1/6/2021 1:32:00 PM

Oh Jan, had a great laugh at this, read it it to my hubby he laughed out loud too. Listened to the reading, it’s hilarious especially as it it’s true. Thank you for telling me about it in reply to my poem with the same title, mine is nowhere as good as this is. Hugs, Belle:-) xx

Jan Allison
Date: 1/7/2021 10:34:00 AM

yes its one of my fave poems it wasnt the first one I wrote that is called splendid isolation written when my hubby was undergoing cancer surgery but i wanted to be known for my witty poems so posted this one as my first on soup:-) hugs Jan xx

John Watt

Date: 4/5/2020 8:30:00 PM

Jan, I returned to this gem of a poem to hear your jewel of a voice. Adding this to my faves. I feel I know you better - so glad you included your reading! Many thanks to Brian's blog for making us aware this is here...

Jan Allison
Date: 7/15/2020 5:57:00 PM

It's my fave poem - not the first one i wrote that is called splendid Isolation. but i wanted to be known for my silly poems hence the reason i chose this one to be my first to post on soup:-) hugs jan xx

Quoth Theraven

Date: 4/5/2020 8:24:00 PM

Jan, Came here for the accent, stayed for the stiffy cockie pudding. I don't think that dish is in season quite yet. What I really like are the biscuits. We call them cookies. Because we're kooky like that. -Richard

Jan Allison
Date: 7/15/2020 5:55:00 PM

thanks Richard sorry have only just found the comment:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 4/5/2020 1:17:00 PM

Jan, your voice is awesome. Had I heard it before?? I know I saw this poem before, but did you have your voice recorded with it from the beginning?

Jan Allison
Date: 4/5/2020 1:51:00 PM

No Andrea I only added the audio when soup gave this feature for PM members:-) hugs Jan x

John Watt

Date: 2/29/2020 12:08:00 AM

Clearly I'm not the first to LOL at this gem of yours. So brilliant! Hard to imagine anything ever beating this in a humor contest ~ John

Jan Allison
Date: 4/5/2020 10:13:00 AM

Sorry for the delay in replying John I've just found your comment when I saw Nina's one just now. Its my all time fave especially because its a true story:-) My friends still tease me when we go out lol:-) hugs Jan xx