Job Offer

Don't stop me now... I'm on a roll

The words are literally flying out of my brain

I can't type fast enough... need a secretary

Any offers? Payment will be in the form of hugs

Uh! No worries... everything will be proper

(Actually I can't promise that... but I'll give it my best shot!)

One thing I CAN promise though...

If those of the male persuasion apply and I hire one

Payment in the form of a hand shake

And will apply in lieu of a hug

But I'll accompany that with a wink and a smile!

There are side benefits for the ladies in addition to the hugs

The ladies will also receive a bouquet of red roses

At the end of this contract

And a pat on the bum... oops, scratch that!

Not their bums, silly!

Now that I've gained your confidence

That I will conduct this in a very business like manner (???)

I'll be accepting resumes at [email protected]

Offer expires January 30th 2015!



© Jack Ellison 2014

fantasyhumornarrative

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Dr. Upma A. Sharma

December 5, 2014 at 1:12 AM

Another applicant is me! Irresistible offer Jack!When r u calling in interviews??? U r goin to hv tough time choosing!!

Jack Ellison

December 5, 2014 at 8:42 AM

So I can assume you are applying for the job! Not too many applicants so far, so you stand a good chance! LOL XXX

Carol Eastman

December 4, 2014 at 12:57 PM

Jack! Did you hide Cathies rolling pin before typing that email address? Dragon stop practicing winking! It looks like his eye is twitching. Just bat your eyes! Not so fast! With those eye lashes you're about to take off! Besides, I'm your secretary, and pooper scooper all in one! I sometimes wonder how I get caught up in these things? Oh I know! I said WINNING! Grandpa Troll then magically appeared with a cute little egg! That hatched a cute little Dragon who then imprinted on me and bit me.

Jack Ellison

December 4, 2014 at 4:40 PM

Should be, "cracked it BEFORE and some stuff" XXX

Jack Ellison

December 4, 2014 at 4:37 PM

Please don't tell Cathie, she'll bust my head with that thing! She can actually throw it from across the room with accuracy! Got a hard head but she's cracked it below and some stuff leaked out! LOL XXX

Carol Eastman

December 4, 2014 at 1:01 PM

UMMM... There's a lesson to be learned here... Never accept candy from a stranger... or an egg from a Troll... Dragon thinking I was his first meal, should have told me something. I know! I know! Think before you leap! Er look... Er... something like that!... No wonder I'm in trouble!