Jealousy

Germs, marked with a big red J crawl inside your heart one by one 
They take over your brain, causing you to do and say things you didn't mean 
The more space they consume, the more you worry that you're going to be left again 
Abandonment will take over you once more. 

The funny thing about these germs though is that they're created by your own body 
Then your body rejects them like they're some sort of foreign object
But you can't get rid of them that easy
Medication will not make you feel better this time

The only cure to these germs is love 
Love that cannot be seen or heard, but felt 
And the second that love is questioned or challenged your body makes more germs 
Possessiveness is not the answer though 

The germs watch as the ones you love live their lives and talk to people who aren't you 
Then they laugh their menacing laugh and they create more germs in your brain
But these germs are different. 
'A' is the letter that marks these germs in dark blue 

These new germs flood your brain with irrational thoughts and feelings
The J germs and the A germs multiply until you can't figure out which is which 
Yet you try so hard to give everyone their own life 
Ignoring the germs will never help but obsessing will not help either

Then the germs scream at you. 
They scream at you to push everyone away that you're close to 
You're just so scared you're going to lose them
Giving up is just as bad as possessiveness 

Now that you're confused with yourself some new germs are born
A crossbreed of the J germs and the A germs 
These new germs are called the C germs 
Confusion with yourself causes more pain. 

Now you push everyone away and a new germ is born; the G germ 
Everything is falling farther and farther apart like never before
The germs keep multiplying and encouraging each other
Guilt has arisen. 

The cycle of germs is a vicious one
They won't stop multiplying until you feel as if you can't control anything anymore
The fact that you can't control it pushes them all away more and more
Friendship has been lost
 
It started with the germs marked with the red J
It ended with regret and hurt for everyone 
All the germs keep multiplying; crossbreeding, inbreeding, breeding with their own kind
Control is lost
 
All you were fighting for in the first place was to not lose the ones you love
Now you're not even sure if they love you anymore 
You've screwed it up too much 
And the cycle begins again...

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.