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Jealousy
Germs, marked with a big red J crawl inside your heart one by one They take over your brain, causing you to do and say things you didn't mean The more space they consume, the more you worry that you're going to be left again Abandonment will take over you once more. The funny thing about these germs though is that they're created by your own body Then your body rejects them like they're some sort of foreign object But you can't get rid of them that easy Medication will not make you feel better this time The only cure to these germs is love Love that cannot be seen or heard, but felt And the second that love is questioned or challenged your body makes more germs Possessiveness is not the answer though The germs watch as the ones you love live their lives and talk to people who aren't you Then they laugh their menacing laugh and they create more germs in your brain But these germs are different. 'A' is the letter that marks these germs in dark blue These new germs flood your brain with irrational thoughts and feelings The J germs and the A germs multiply until you can't figure out which is which Yet you try so hard to give everyone their own life Ignoring the germs will never help but obsessing will not help either Then the germs scream at you. They scream at you to push everyone away that you're close to You're just so scared you're going to lose them Giving up is just as bad as possessiveness Now that you're confused with yourself some new germs are born A crossbreed of the J germs and the A germs These new germs are called the C germs Confusion with yourself causes more pain. Now you push everyone away and a new germ is born; the G germ Everything is falling farther and farther apart like never before The germs keep multiplying and encouraging each other Guilt has arisen. The cycle of germs is a vicious one They won't stop multiplying until you feel as if you can't control anything anymore The fact that you can't control it pushes them all away more and more Friendship has been lost It started with the germs marked with the red J It ended with regret and hurt for everyone All the germs keep multiplying; crossbreeding, inbreeding, breeding with their own kind Control is lost All you were fighting for in the first place was to not lose the ones you love Now you're not even sure if they love you anymore You've screwed it up too much And the cycle begins again...
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things