Inner Feelings

I may have a hard heart; However, it is a fragile heart. Easily punctured Easily cracked. It’ll easily splinter, Shatter into tiny pieces Like broken glass Falling at my feet. It’s hard to repair. Unlike my mind It has nothing to spare. No emotions available. Empty beyond words. No love accessible. The more pain inflicted upon my heart The closer it comes To falling apart. I’m already on the edge Hanging Over the abyss of dread. Every day, I wait for the thread to pop. In every way, I imagine myself falling Through the darkness of the dreadful abyss. Can’t my heart and mind come together In harmonious bliss? I dream. But as I do My heart mentally screams. It is lonely. My internal eyes refuse to see And I refuse to believe it. In my world, I don’t need anyone I am already alone Sitting in darkness wishing for sun. I want its rays to reveal my life’s path. I lone for someone to guide me down it. Make me smile, laugh. I want to be embraced. But I don’t want to search for the arms that will hold me. For I fear they will drop me and crack my mentally emotional face. My life is full of fear. Even if I don’t want to acknowledge it. And my eyes want to release, at least, a single tear. I won’t allow it To fall.