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In the Shadows

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Italian Sonnet

A ten syllable per line sonnet, consisting of an octave with the rhyme pattern abbaabba followed by six lines with a rhyme pattern of cdecde , cdcdcd or cdccdc

I spy you standing in the shadows cast by a flashing neon sign, bumming a smoke, with your nose dripping as it does on coke; your pale skin and red hair in sharp contrast. And you're ogled by shady men you've asked for a smoke, even some hippy type bloke who tries to convince you to take a toke. You didn't recognize me as I passed. Like a silhouette inked by the darkness, you are framed by flashing colored lights, and so drunk, three times you had to hurl. This alley holds an aura of starkness and although I know all about your rights, I won't walk away; you're my baby girl! (Italian Sonnet) 8/8/2018

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Jesse Rowe

Date: 8/30/2018 6:03:00 AM

An important thought that EVERYONE is someone's baby. Definitely a cutting write. I did notice you used ABAB in the first stanza even though you said it was ABBA. Only mentioning because you asked us to point anything out.

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/30/2018 8:29:00 AM

Thanks so much Jesse, I didn't catch that...I'm grateful to you for pointing that out and have corrected the error my friend, Emile.

John Gondolf

Date: 8/24/2018 7:51:00 AM

Emile, as I was reading this sonnet I was thinking it was nicely written and then I got to the last line and it ripped me in two. This one will linger with me today. Nicely written. John

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/24/2018 8:44:00 AM

Thanks John, I'm happy you liked it, as always I appreciate your support my friend, Emile.

Line Gauthier

Date: 8/11/2018 12:23:00 PM

Wow - what a touching poem, Emile. A FAVE for me.

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/11/2018 12:41:00 PM

Thanks Line, I'm happy you liked it, as always I appreciate your support my friend, Emile.

Wendy Watson

Date: 8/8/2018 3:01:00 PM

Hello Emile A hopefully fictional scenario but one which would make any parent shiver. The ally holds a aura of starkness: Slight correction as you have asked : The alley holds an aura of starkness Best wishes Wendy

Wendy Watson
Date: 8/8/2018 3:33:00 PM

No problem, Emile. 'An aura' because of the vowel sound after the indefinite article. I wish I had the ability to write poetry in French!

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/8/2018 3:23:00 PM

Thanks ever so much Wendy, that's exactly the kind of error I was hoping to catch my friend, Emile

Arturo Michael

Date: 8/8/2018 11:25:00 AM

Enjoyed the imagery and message...All the best Emile

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/8/2018 1:17:00 PM

Thank you very much Arturo, I appreciate you encouragement and support my friend, Emile.

Sunlite Wanter

Date: 8/8/2018 11:05:00 AM

A father's dilemma! And a mother's, too. The world says "tough love," but the heart says something much different. I have a tear.

Emile Pinet
Date: 8/8/2018 1:16:00 PM

Thanks Sunlite, I welcome your visits my friend, Emile.