Imagine If You Will
Imagine if you will.
by Sue Ella DeVille on Thursday, January 5, 2012 at 3:07am
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Imagine if you will.... being young, beautiful, living life on top of the world. Imagine thinking the world is the best place to be. Imagine hearing the phone ring, its your best friend, your mother, her comforting voice that means everything will be ok. But its not. Imagine if you will hearing a trembling voice, one thats always happy but this time its not, its the voice of death calling. Susie, your oak tree is dying. Imagine now that your world has crashed, came to a stop, hurt and confusion set in. Momma, please dont go, I dont know my way, I need you. "baby, lean on your family, theres a whole forrest of trees". Imagine if you will, the long quiet drive, 6 hours of silence, just to hear people talking thru the curtians, whispers," Is that the children? what will happn to them? oh, theyre old enough to fend for themselves" but still, we are numb. Imagine if you will, a Priest rambling on, banging on inscents, walking around the box that holds her, we watch yet I have no memory, only of the numbness. Imagine now coming home, alone, just wanting to grab something of hers, just to smell her, feel her, touch her one more time, But theres nothing. an empty house. Its all gone. "You dont deserve anything! you are a bad child, I will decide who can have her things" Imagine now if you will, nothing, nothing to touch, nothing to feel, nothing to smell. everyone has gone, you're a kid, sitting on the step of an empty house. alone. no forrest, just an empty field (I wrote this July 8th, about 5 years ago on the 25th anniversary of her death, I sent it in a letter & then I destroyed the original, it was to painful to remember. She's in my head once again pushing me to write my trouble & my feelings, she does this to me when i need her most, she's still a good momma to me)
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