If You Like Eating Out DONT READ
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From the kitchen came a very odd smell
Menu was in Thai so I couldn't tell
Pointed and asked what is that
The waiter said its grilled rat
Was outta there like a bat outta hell...
Went out with some friends for beer and meat pies
Asked the waiter to make mine a surprise
Well I took a huge bite
And nearly died of fright
The filling was made of fish and cows eyes...
ALL YOU CAN EAT
Went to a cafe where all you can eat
Thought I'd go large and have me a nice treat
Carrots, meat and some leeks
Then I heard the squeaks
Saw the food move and went white as a sheet...
Why do restaurants sell meals that are cheap
Thought I'd go in check one out take a peep
I didn't like what I saw
Food undercooked and quite raw
And lamb kebabs may not be from a sheep...
BURGER AND FRIES
For fries and burger I was in the mood
I went in but quickly went off my food
I'll tell you the reason why
The waiter's wore just a tie
And nothing else they were totally nude...
WHATS IN A STEW (DONT ASK)
In restaurants never order a stew
What they put in to it would make you spew
Scraps from the day before
Some scrapings off the floor
And some other bits you'll find hard to chew...
Low lighting creates an ambient mood
Lovers taken out to eat and be wooed
They don't want you to sue
And you would if you knew
How kitchen staff really prepared your food...
(All fiction, I hope)
Written on 18th September 2020.
Copyright © Tom Cunningham | Year Posted 2020
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