If My Stove Could Talk-Tribute To a Major Appliance

Oh My Gosh! What’s the matter with you? You could be squatting outside over a fire! So you have to clean me once in awhile…big deal! I slave for you with never a thank you. Turn a knob and I heat your fancy pans.. I simmer, I boil, I bake for hours… And what do I get in return…whining about the new self cleaning ovens…stainless steel the big “I have to have”! I may be plain but I never let you down. and yet…you sigh whenever you have to wipe a spill. So who's fault it that? You’re the one who was gossiping on the phone.. Not my fault! I hate to be the one to tell you..but You’re A Crummy Cook!”..I do my best but you’ve got to follow a recipe…you’re not a natural!.. Awwwhhh, forget it I’m tired. You don’t listen anyway… Who cares if you order take out tomorrow… Not me, that’s for sure…