If I Were Newly-Elected President
As the newly-elected president of the grand ol' U. S. of A.
I would tell the truth to friend and foe alike and, like it or not,
Order all legal federal actions against former leaders dropped.
I will proclaim the cherished values that make our country great,
While issuing a directive religion and politics are forever separate,
Order the I.R.S. to collect property taxes from all offending churches.
I will forgive all future payments on college student loans, and
Extend unemployment to the jobless--as a result of COVID-19.
I will grant humane treatment to all international refugees.
I will announce an extensive refurbishing infrastructure program,
And increase the minimum wage to $15 per hour (phased in).
I will call for a universal healthcare, single-payer system,
Announce on Day One ending the unnecessary war in Afghanistan,
Call my cabinet together and inform them of my no tolerance for grift.
I will call Mr. Vladimir Putin and tell him no more meddling, period,
I will make education through Community College tuition-free,
I will make America more about her citizens and less about me.
I will abolish the Department of Education; abolish the U.S.D.A., too,
And erect on the White House lawn a children’s petting zoo!
I will draft and extend an all-nation's nuclear non-proliferation treaty, then
Make a list of all worthy eligible candidates for the U.S. Supreme Court,
Sell my golf clubs and, lastly, take a good, long, well-deserved nap!
SECOND PLACE WINNER
Written on February 7, 2021
For the “If I Were President” contest
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