If I Were a Girl
If I had been born a girl
I wonder what would rock my world
I really have to stop and think
I guess I’d have to start liking pink
One thing I know that would be really great
I know I’d never make a single mistake
I could change my mind all of the time
Oh wait a minute … no I wouldn’t
Well yeah, I guess I would
Or not
Maybe
Yeah, I would change my mind all the time
Naw, that wouldn’t be fair to my guy
Ahh – who cares … surely not I
I suppose I would have to get used to carrying a purse
Of course, there are other things to get used to a whole lot worse
I wouldn’t have to shave my face …
But I would have to shave almost every other place
If I were to be a girl
I don’t think I would be one of those liberated kind
Treat me like a delicate flower
I really would not even mind
I guess I couldn’t burp and fart in public
That would really cramp my style
And I know I couldn’t walk in high heels
Not even for one tenth of a mile
And one thing I know for sure,
I would be the ugliest girl under the sky …
No – I think I’ll just scratch and spit
And thank God I was born a guy
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