Get Your Premium Membership

Iambic Evenings

I wandered through the testimony grand Tones lingered frayed and went there way quite mad I smiled and laughed with congruent dismay The flowers wilt with tiny drops of steps The skyness of the blackness comfort thee When all is done and all is meant to be.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2010




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 2/22/2010 7:37:00 PM
Matt, if skyness is not preferred by some, here is an alternative: "and blackness of the sky will comfort thee. . . " or "and may the heaven's blackness comfort thee" You just search around for a better synonym to fit the beat. Pretty good imabic beat in this one, and like Marty, I too loved line two! Andrea
Login to Reply
Date: 2/6/2010 1:04:00 PM
Interesting
Login to Reply
Date: 2/6/2010 12:03:00 PM
I have a problem with the word "skyness" too, but for the life of me I couldn't take it out. I think because the poem itself starts to self-destruct in its own sense of congruency as soon as the "flowers" line hits. In one sense, if I'm going to write something like "testimony grand," I don't see why "skyness" is such a reach from there. What can I say? I like 'em slippery and evasive of meaning...
Login to Reply
Date: 2/6/2010 7:50:00 AM
I love that you captured the mood in the title! Yes.....!!
Login to Reply
Date: 2/6/2010 12:10:00 AM
I like "Tones lingered frayed and went their way quite mad".....Very nice...Enjoyed...Marty
Login to Reply

Book: Shattered Sighs