Iambic Evenings

I wandered through the testimony grand
Tones lingered frayed and went there way quite mad
I smiled and laughed with congruent dismay
The flowers wilt with tiny drops of steps
The skyness of the blackness comfort thee
When all is done and all is meant to be.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Dietrich Avatar
February 22, 2010 at 7:37 PM
Matt, if skyness is not preferred by some, here is an alternative: "and blackness of the sky will comfort thee. . . " or "and may the heaven's blackness comfort thee" You just search around for a better synonym to fit the beat. Pretty good imabic beat in this one, and like Marty, I too loved line two! Andrea
Palli Avatar
February 6, 2010 at 1:04 PM
Interesting
Caliri Avatar
February 6, 2010 at 12:03 PM
I have a problem with the word "skyness" too, but for the life of me I couldn't take it out. I think because the poem itself starts to self-destruct in its own sense of congruency as soon as the "flowers" line hits. In one sense, if I'm going to write something like "testimony grand," I don't see why "skyness" is such a reach from there. What can I say? I like 'em slippery and evasive of meaning...
Richards Avatar
February 6, 2010 at 7:50 AM
I love that you captured the mood in the title! Yes.....!!
Owens Avatar
February 6, 2010 at 12:10 AM
I like "Tones lingered frayed and went their way quite mad".....Very nice...Enjoyed...Marty
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace