I Wish I Was a Bangladeshi Chef

I am handed a bottle of wine I am told it's French and then, well, that's it I offer my son another mint He'll one day discover mint sauce I'm drinking yoghurt out of a glass I'm annoyed at the hotel buffet The fried eggs have all gone The chef can't keep up I offer my services behind the counter I hear the waiter changing his accent with different customers (again) Love waffles A bowl of stupid Liquid breakfast Eat my shorts But there was man Who wanted a statue of himself In his hometown On horseback In the nude Name a bus shelter after me