I Want To Shout At Myself

I just want to shout at myself and say, “When will you ever learn, that not everyone has the same heart as you, how many times do you have to be burned?” “What will it take for you to open your eyes? That just because you loved them, it doesn’t mean that there were no lies” “Maybe you didn’t know then and maybe you never will, but you’re allowed to question the past and all that you still feel” “You can think to yourself, if I knew then what I know now, I would have made better choices back then, I would have figured it out” But all the shouting at myself won’t get me anywhere, it’s not like you’re going to just wake up one day and remember that you care I’m just so mad at myself because I knew better, I know now how it should have been, you should have walked away with me in my story, at the end Maybe if I were different, maybe I just wasn’t enough for you, if I could have just been the person that you needed then, maybe our love would still be true But I feel that a part of me was still immature and inexperienced, at least when it came to love, because at the end of our life together even after all that I gave, it just wasn’t enough Tell me what I could have done different? Who did you need me to be? I thought that back then that all that you needed, was me But now here I am shouting at myself, for all this infliction I am in, and knowing that deep down inside I caused it, I am the one that didn’t listen.