I miss this parting wish

these carnal desires will see me expire inseperately stained from this foul game of avoiding the smallest pricks of pain, growing rage for making me play with these machinations inside my brain, artificial aspirations alienate the cause and effect, misdirect these things we call laws it's so flawed, I can't move on I'm weighed down by noiseless sound, of no one else around, can't let that put us down the drumming want to take a jaunt, to run away with no embrace can't look back or face regret still managing to get upset bereft of those I truly wept, but on I crept, each lowley step a constant pace and rhythmic breath, unruly unrest, unconsciousness, what does it mean do I exist or just subsist on this planet, trapped in my orbital plane, fighting flames of growing disdain, this dark domain will surely wane but not without closing its veins refrain from pulling the trigger that figures, it doesn't help you or me so I think I'll reconsider trying to see this whole play through