I Don'T Know and What If

I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
Let it sink in
I don't know the answer
I don't know who you are
I don't know myself
I don't know how to get there
I don't know her
I don't know you that well
I don't know the next step

I don't know the answer
Or maybe I do
What if I am pretending
What if not knowing is my way of controlling you
Not having to take responsibility
What if I just want to see what you know
What if I am practicing to become a politician
Or maybe it's true 
I don't know

I don't know who you are
I would like to
Really I would
What if we spent more time together
I think that would help
What if you opened up a bit more
What if I listened more
That's not always easy
I'm still trying to figure out myself
That's right
I don't know myself

There are times I think I do
When I think I have figured me out
What if I'm deluding myself
What if I can't handle the truth
What if I need some time alone, to figure it out
What if I don't know, how to get there from here

I could ask for directions
Then what kind of man would I be
What if it would be okay, to question myself
To be able to say 
I don't know
I don't have the answers
What if like you, I'm just trying to figure it out
What if, I know myself better than I think
What if it's my way, of protecting myself

When I was young
A girl said "I don't know you that well"
Still she wanted to be with me
Not because she wanted to know me better
It was a hunger we both felt
I don't know her anymore
I didn't know her then
What if I had said no
Had not gone down that road to losing myself
What if I had waited
Waited, till I knew myself
Just a little better
I don't know
And yes sometimes I do
What if "I don't know" is the excuse I used
To do the things
I wanted to do
What if by saying, "I don't know the next step"
I wasn't responsible
I didn't have to take the blame
I could have waited
But I didn't want to

I don't know
I don't know
But
What if
I did
What if I do
I don't know
But 
What if 
What if it's all nothing but a game
I don't know
Still round and round I go
What if
I stopped
I don't know
I just don't know!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Aiane Avatar
November 22, 2016 at 2:56 PM
hmm.
Vaso Avatar
November 28, 2014 at 4:04 PM
I Just dont know how to tell you this, but another brilliant piece of poetry here!
Lamoureux Avatar
November 28, 2014 at 4:07 PM
My favourite humorist. So good to have you amongst the living. Thanks Artur.
Hicks Avatar
November 25, 2014 at 5:43 PM
It's a humbling experience to admit that you don't know. But also there are times we say, I don't know, just to keep wearing the cloak of indifference. To admit to knowing is to risk possible conflict, and it scares us. Your poetry is very therapeutic to read, because it tugs at the parts of the soul that most people veer away from - but is there nonetheless.
Lamoureux Avatar
November 26, 2014 at 7:31 AM
Thankyou Timothy, that means alot to me.
Sirak Avatar
November 24, 2014 at 7:43 AM
You do ask the tough questions. We are experts at hiding from ourselves, hiding behind barriers we erect, and convincing ourselves we just don't know.
Lamoureux Avatar
November 24, 2014 at 8:29 AM
Isn't that the truth. Thanks for pondering my thoughts.
Richards Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 10:11 AM
This is the kind of poem I know so well..... If I am not presuming too much, I think I know it came spilling out from your heart, to your finger-tips, to the typewritten words, almost without control....without you even knowing what was inside yourself? Until reading it back...and then saying.....whew! Where did that come from?.......Am I even close? I felt this deeply!
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 10:28 AM
Yes, it took me where it took me. Thanks Carrie.
Deschler Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 1:32 AM
Being shy, I would always say "I don't know" when I was afraid to share my opinion, for fear of what someone would think of me. But, now I do know myself, and who I am is okay.... This is a very deep write with so much to ponder. Excellent work, Richard!
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 8:38 AM
Getting in trouble a lot when I was a kid, saying "I don't know" seemed an everyday occurrence with me. I'm pleased by your thoughtful response Kelly.
Kayode Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 10:11 PM
You do know Richard only the urge to know more authors this,but who will contest it with you that millions hide under " I don't know" to avoid responsibility or exploit others ? You now see why we respect you here...talent Richard, talent!
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 8:40 AM
I am humbled by your comment and visits Kayode.
Dietrich Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 8:15 PM
gosh, this has a name, when you just write what comes in your mind, but I forgot what they call it. I was thinking it had to do with a moral question that was mentioned inside the poem. I wonder if got that right. it is very interesting how it just keeps going and still ends up I just don't know!
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 8:45 AM
I do feel I know myself but there are things I am constantly learning about myself. I am an open person yet there are some things I hide even from myself. In the end the only one who truly knows is God and I am thankful he resides in my heart.
Breidenthal Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 4:13 PM
A great poem filled with deep honesty. A very touching piece here. Thanks for sharing. : ) "There are times I think I do When I think I have figured me out What if I'm deluding myself" Surely I can relate. Awesome work. Always, Laura
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 8:46 AM
It means a lot to me that you have taken time to ponder my thoughts. I thank you Laura.
Smith Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 3:28 PM
Many times I wonder if I really know myself as well...excellent..left me to ponder
Lamoureux Avatar
November 23, 2014 at 8:47 AM
If you read my response to Andrea you will know some of my thoughts on the subject. Thanks for reading Tim.
Manassian Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 11:13 AM
I don't know either.... I really enjoyed reading through this, Richard. Will we ever know ourselves? I really don't know...
Manassian Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 3:02 PM
That last bit was tongue in cheek! ;)
Lamoureux Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 2:10 PM
Some of us know ourselves better than others but I believe it is an ongoing process.
Allison Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 11:12 AM
Thought provoking write Richard - two questions we ask ourselves and wonder if we really made the right decision but I guess it is the only way we learn is by making decisions and sticking by them - right or wrong it is a learning curve for us all. Hugs Jan xx
Lamoureux Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 2:12 PM
hopefully a curve and not a boomerang that nails us in the back of the head *lol*. Thanks Jan, hugs back to you.
Chircop Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 9:18 AM
I can't explain the way this poem made me scrutinize myself Richard.What if I'm in this battle eith myself of Knowing and not knowing..At least now Im not alone who have these kind of debates with my soul.A favourite!Charma
Lamoureux Avatar
November 22, 2014 at 9:44 AM
Thanks Charmaine, I had fun playing with this one. Thanks for being the first to comment. I have had several reads and no comments so I was wondering if I missed the mark. Hugs Rick.
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace