How Mr Pie Came To Rule the World

It all started when Mr. Pie was a little bugger, Just a wisp of fluff in the palm of your hand. "Oh, isn't mama's little man the most handsomest EVER?!" Not a day has gone by when he has argued that point! "Be careful with all that encouragement" I prophetically warned, "It may go straight to his head!!"....and what a head it became!! Grey, dignified, regal....a lions mane with white marbling. 2 golden eyes piercing you with that casually bored stare one may give to one's shoes. Every morning at 8 am and every night at 10 pm he demonstrates his knowledge of time. Head-butting the door and SCREAMING the words "MOM!!! MAAAWWWMMMM!!......NOW???!!???.........MOM??? NOWWWWW??" (for real!!) Needless to say, he's got us trained pretty well, But we're still working on house-breaking me!!!!! He still has yet to teach us PROPER portion control, And I get the impression I'm not so popular when I give less than expected. Maybe it's the "Death-threat" stare, or maybe the Kitty Log in my slippers, I don't know! All I can tell you is don't EVER make the mistake of addressing him as a "cat" Or you may come to know the justice of King Pie, The Terrible........just a warning!!