Clive Culverhouse Poet Light Verse

How May I Help You Today?

Good morning, 
Gibbers And Watts how may I help you today? 
Yes Sir I can help you with that.
Have you had any thoughts on how you would like to be killed? 
Ok yes so like an accident? 
We do have a couple of offers on at the moment.
We can do an industrial accident with a mention on the six o'clock news, or for slightly more money we can murder you with a full reconstruction on prime time television and a feature on the news.
Yes Sir, we have a full range of ways we can kill you and all at competitive prices.
Certainly, I can send you a brochure and then you can talk to one of our advisors. 
Can I take your name and address and I will send a brochure out to you…
Thank you for calling, enjoy the rest of your day.
Good Morning, 
Gibbers And Watts how may I help you today?

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David Kavanagh October 27, 2024 at 10:12 AM This one reminds me of those suicide booths in Futurama, you put your money in, and it asks if you would like a quick death or a slow and painful one, all said and done in a completely matter of fact way, perhaps we are heading that way or already there Clive, such is life! love the indifferent sarcasm in this one, cheers David Clive Culverhouse October 27, 2024 at 3:14 PM Hi David, I wrote it a few years ago and forgot about it, found it the other day and yes, I was amused by its matter of fact way as you say, absolutely, indifferent sarcasm, thanks for reading