How Could You

How could you turn out like this Maybe it was something that I did I know I made my mistakes and had you feeling like second place But I renigged on that bid But how could you Make me choose between my child and you Make me choose between eating and breathing Sleeping and peeing Medicine and dry heaving But you can't fathom why I'm turning into this heathen Why I roll up my sleeves and bellow from the tip of my lungs what am I to believe in What am I supposed to not be bereaving Letting her go because of her choice is one thing But after all the struggling I take Pain that I embraced Lack of self I intaked and just to have you spit In my face I'm thrown to the ground and you mushed my face more to the ground and ask what did I do now? Why you mad? What's wrong ? Why you upset? Maybe because because my breast plate has been used as an ashtray Or porta potty and than u smear my name in disgrace My other half whom supposed to have my back when the strength in me lacks And I slack in holding up the world Blocking the bombardment of those who misbehave And shave my head and put on war paint To do battle with anything coming our way The whole time I was blind and not seeing the corruption from inside Something I mustard up in my prime The destruction of my own tribe From not being there And now I must throw the cold shoulder in order to show I care But that's not nothing Just a gloom of dispear Is my cologne that I apparently love go where......peace