Mike Hauser Poet Rhyme

Honey Boo Boo Where Are You

I live in North East Florida 
That's just a hop, skip, and a jump
From the land known as Georgia
Where "Honey Boo Boo" once held court with her mom

If'n you never knew "Honey Boo Boo"
You're in for a treat or more than one
She was a multi car train wreak
That you couldn't turn your bugged eyes away from

First let me explain the state of Georgia
So this family ya'll will understand
Not long ago they re-dirted both paved roads
Said progress was getting way out of hand

So with that said and done son 
With formalities out of the way
Lets turn our attention back to our star attraction
And see what all she had to say

Her fame started out on Toddlers & Tiaras 
Reality shows we all seem to love
From The Crazed Housewives to The Kardashion's
America can not get enough

And since it's on T.V. it's gotta be true
Did you ever try her drink sensation
Of Red Bull and Mountain Dew, she liked to call "Go Go Juice"
It'll put hair on your derriere for extra pad in relaxation 

And who wouldn't want to see a six year old
With that kind of Hellacious Buzz
What went through my mind when I looked at it was
Ahhh, Redneck Motherly Love

So now do you redneckonize her
Where all I just said is quite true
A dolla used to make her holla!
I sure miss "Honey Boo Boo" on the Boob Tube
As I'm sure all of you do too...

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Sunlite Wanter August 16, 2017 at 9:27 AM I wanted to read something funny, saw your name, and was not disappointed!!!! You're the laughneker.

Anita Harris August 14, 2017 at 9:20 PM I never thought I would see Honey Boo Boo immortalized in a poem! Kudos for redneckonizing her.

Daniel Turner July 19, 2017 at 9:30 AM Mike, you watch too much TV. Lol Hilarious!

Lim'Rik Flats July 19, 2017 at 9:16 AM I feel like I should give you a dolla for every OUTSTANDING redneckism in this jewel! I would if I had 'em, you'd be redneck rich too;-) Can't award GOTD! for this gem (giggle of the day) it'd be too cheap. How about giggle of the century? To my faves ~ john

Cheryl Hoffman July 18, 2017 at 7:38 PM Lol, "redneckonize" her…sorry but I wouldn't know Honey Boo Boo if she walked by me on the street…had to look her up; something about her having a boyfriend and her Mom losing a ton of weight? You go Honey Boo Boo Mom for losing all that weight and hope Honey Boo Boo grows up to be a normal adult!~Che :)