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Hillbilly Redneck Sonnet

This redneck is fixin' to go dancin'
You reckon we get gussied up and go?
I'll be a high flutin' and a prancin'
Is the honky-tonk puttin' on a show?

Shall I wear my fanciest clod hoppers?
Shall I phone all your fiddle playin' kin?
I am gonna be such a show stopper.
We shall enter the dance contest and win.

I've got a hankerin' for hot romance,
And some granny-slappin' hillbilly sex.
Bear ten younguns, live in 'ternity pants
Did you just skedaddle, my newest ex?

Dern it, Darlin', thought we were so well matched.
I counted my chickens before they hatched!

Written 3/2/2017
Entered in Mid December Premiere
Hosted by Brian Strand

Copyright © Rhoda Tripp | Year Posted 2017

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CayCay Jennings Date: 5/4/2018 8:08:00 AM I saw you on the hillbillie poem list and rushed over to shout, " I MISS YOU ." Turns out this isn't for the Hillbillie, Bibillie, Blowbillie contest as I originally ran over here thinking, but is absolutely a hoot any way. So well-written, Rhoda, and your sense of humor is always spot-on when you use it and deliver it. No tellin what Mr. Strand thought, seriously - no telling, but I loved it. I really do miss you. All the best ... CayCay Login to Reply

Paul Callus Date: 12/30/2017 2:46:00 AM How could I have missed this excellent hillbilly rendition, Rhoda!! Both your humor and dialect are so very entertaining! Still wondering how this entry did not make it to the winners' list!! ~ May I take this opportunity to wish you all the best for 2018, including lots of lovely inspiration:) Regards // paul Login to Reply Rhoda Tripp Date: 12/30/2017 11:38:00 AM Thank you, Paul. That hillbilly dialect and the ease in which it flows is a tad spooky. Lol. Best wishes for you, Dear, in 2018.

Silent One Date: 12/23/2017 12:19:00 PM This is great, love that hillbilly dialect, this is a great sonnet, the hillbilly equivalent of Shakespeare's English sonnet.. excellent.. Login to Reply Rhoda Tripp Date: 12/25/2017 11:13:00 AM Thank you, Dear. Shakespeare would roll over in his grave if he read this atrocity. Lol.

Cheryl Hoffman Date: 12/16/2017 9:58:00 PM Lol, love the hillbilly humor in this here knee slappin' poem!~Che :) Login to Reply Rhoda Tripp Date: 12/17/2017 10:18:00 AM Thank you, Cheryl. It's not your normal love dripping, sappy sonnet, but I never claimed to be normal. Lol. Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad you enjoyed it.

John Gondolf Date: 11/29/2017 4:49:00 AM This one is great fun, Rhoda, I got my morning laugh. Login to Reply Rhoda Tripp Date: 11/29/2017 11:40:00 AM Lol. I'm not sure which dark recesses of my brain my muse pulled this one from but I'm glad "she" gave you a chuckle. I blame "her" for my most odd pieces. ;)

Edward Mccall Date: 11/28/2017 9:25:00 AM This is hilarious!!! I lost it on the line; granny-slappin' hillbilly sex. Woman you shere kin tattle them there tails. lol Login to Reply Rhoda Tripp Date: 11/28/2017 12:43:00 PM Yah, Edward...that line scared me a tad. Its like my muse found a tiny crevice in my rock hard brain and chiseled until she found some latent form of molecular DNA left behind by Cro-Magnon Man. I hope that Granny stuff isn't in my jeans. Lol.