Hello, I'M Still Here

the way that I’m feeling right now is exhaustingly difficult to explain with words – I feel like a child, even now when I try to communicate with you, but I don’t think you’ve ever heard my voice. and every once in a while when my strong slowly dims to an ember, I knew that this was no accident. they know that it makes me angry, because, well, there are an infinite amount of words that I would knot together within my spine to prove to you just how strong I am without you but a white lie isn’t supposed to hurt anyone. I would like to say so many things to you; to your pure flesh and bones, but the thing is, I’m really bad with public speaking and basically anything that has to do with me walking out on a ledge for you. but, things tend to sound much better on paper anyways, don’t they? and well, words are supposed to be a powerful thing, aren’t they? as I sit here contemplating how I’m going to return some of your life back into my own, I instead find myself thinking about how I’m constantly still fighting for yours. and now here’s where I decide that this way, we’re better existing strictly on ink and paper, so that way, we both win.