Get Your Premium Membership

Haiku 06

wind blasts trees naked as newborn birds... cascade of snowflakes
Honorable Mention "Suit Yourself Contest" Sponsored by: Brian Strand 02/17/2012

Copyright © | Year Posted 2011




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 12/10/2012 8:33:00 AM
love the imagery here Carol, glad i came back in your poems to see this....
Login to Reply
Date: 2/20/2012 11:14:00 AM
Thank you to everyone and congrats to all the winners. Thank you Brian for the placement. Love, Carol
Login to Reply
Date: 2/18/2012 9:17:00 PM
This is the kind of haiku I enjoy reading Carol. Excellent in its concept and imagery. Congratulations on your HM. Honorable indeed! I loved it!
Login to Reply
Date: 2/17/2012 8:45:00 PM
congrats Carol on HM win in the contest .. no snowflakes here in Italy but rather a m8ild season now.. luv..
Login to Reply
Date: 2/17/2012 3:14:00 PM
Congratulations on your win Carol. I see too much of that kind of scenery this time of year in New Jersey.
Login to Reply
Date: 2/17/2012 2:32:00 PM
Well done, Carol. Congrats on placing in Brian's contest..........S.Ronthorpe
Login to Reply
Date: 2/17/2012 1:45:00 PM
Congratulations on your wonderful win Carol, love Elizabeth
Login to Reply
Date: 11/9/2011 12:04:00 AM
wow, this has some great analogy. (I don't agree with Debs on those first two lines being disconnected grammatically. They are grammatical, but I kind of get what she was saying conceptually; however, I do not see eye to eye with all the haiku rules either) I personally think this is one of my personal faves in this contest.
Login to Reply
Brown Avatar
Carol Sunshine Brown
Date: 11/9/2011 6:52:00 AM
Thank you Andrea. It is Deb's contest so I will write another for her. I will keep this one as I have seen the wind beat the leaves from the trees and cause them to be naked as a newborn bird how beautiful it was to see snow come down and blanket the trees
Date: 11/8/2011 3:26:00 PM
Hi Carol..loved the professional way you titled this! Also you did not capitalize or punctuate. You have a strong image to work with too! You need to connect lines 1 & 2 gramatically & conceptually, haiku must have only 2 parts print out this page and it will help you loads & SOUP mail for you too http://sites.google.com/site/graceguts/essays/haiku-checklist
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2011 12:50:00 PM
You have done a great job at applying the rules of haiku! The subject matter is perfect! Ah, the poor poor newborn birds, they suffer through this storm! But then the storm slows down and now there is a great display of new snowflakes, pleasant thought!! Super poem!!
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2011 12:31:00 PM
This is quite a powerful image of a winter storm, Carol. I like the way you lighten it up with your closing line "cascade of snowflakes." Best wishes in Deb's contest with this great haiku! Love, Carolyn
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2011 12:01:00 PM
BRRR! Tony
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2011 10:21:00 AM
Wonderful poem of depth feeling touches very high. I have read and enjoyed a winning poem. Thanks and best of luck for contest. bl
Login to Reply
Date: 11/8/2011 10:16:00 AM
love the similies, Carol. Many congrats on your wins too : )
Login to Reply

Book: Reflection on the Important Things