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Great Contest Expectations, the Folly of Man

Place parsed pennies, purposely upon pretty porcelain palms. The wanderer, restrained her raised ranting wrists! She fell to her Humpty Dumpty position, unable to ever be put back together again... Each of us witnessed her fall, yet we failed to gather those colourful leaves. I believe we could have laid them at the base of her wall. She sees the trees as he increases her diseases. Deepening predatory penetrations as he pleases! Cracking, fracking, hating, taking, and breaking. Bringing about disappearing, as pain stains, her shamed awakening! If we could have, would we have, mournfully watched? Or instead, would we have held her wrists, pulled at reddened panties, excruciated her sufferings? Instead, we placated horrific tugged observations, waited, pretended to see nothing, drank our mocha-chino from starry cups! we sat and licked our lips to the calming sound of muzak, preferring voyeuristic aristocracy. Oh how she cursed his kissing and biting, the sucking of her Texan black gold! All the while he praised her caged loins, filling a billion barrels with her oil... Until the time her flame set fire to his cursed wanting! Until she summoned the winds from the east. It was time to birth the spawn of his treachery. Lava poured forth from mountainess risings! He must suckle upon her displeasure, until like creosol, his noxious presence, combines with his own wasted wood. Thus preserving his monumental failures, encasing them within layers of his strangled death! A voice called out from the West, "Where is the foolish man? Who is left to sing about his great accomplishments? His peculiar monuments have been laid to waste, not a single brick remains in it's place." No one is left to excavate the woeful forgotten. She "Mother" seeps into the soil to reclaim his blood, her womb is once again fertile. She asks "Do we wish to begin again?" The start of a great pause stings her ears! She looks and understands, "It is no longer good!" Literary devices Alliteration Allusion Ambiguity Assonance Asyndeton Written December 29th, 2015 For me Poetry is food for the mind, sometimes it is an appetizer to whet the appetite, or it can be full course meal that takes a while to digest. Other times it can be a sweet desert that tantalizes the senses. I hope this piece offers some mental engagement and nourishment.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015




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Date: 10/7/2016 7:29:00 AM
Congrats Richard, for your placement with this fine piece!! ;-)
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Date: 10/5/2016 11:28:00 AM
Richard, Congratulations on your awesome placement. Stop by and enjoy my latest blog "from my pen" if you'd like. SMILES ~LINDA~
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Date: 2/28/2016 3:27:00 PM
hi richard, sorry it's taken me ages to get round to looking at this! i see a lot in this that you may or may not be aware of, particularly internal rhyme, and i see a nice little anagram with 'caged loins' (caged lions)...it was a really tough contest, and i know cyndi enjoyed all the entries
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Date: 2/26/2016 1:11:00 PM
Hi Richard: Just came back to re-visit your poem. I did enter mine because the entry numbers were filling. I was taken by surprise to get a special mention. I would encourage you -after reading Cyndi's short list to work with this one again. She mentions to limit alliteration. I believe in bringing attention to man's over-all disregard of earth. Best, Suz
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Date: 2/18/2016 10:08:00 PM
I like that you take on a big theme, a panorama of something like civilization's abuse of Nature. Lot of timid poetry, thematically unadventurous out there. >>waited, pretended to see nothing / drank our mocha-chino from starry cups!<< evokes the guilt of inaction, about which libraries could be filled.hvs
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/26/2016 8:05:00 PM
Hi Walter, sorry I missed this comment. Much appreciated.
Date: 2/13/2016 10:16:00 AM
There is quite a lot going on here, and many things to ponder over. The second stanza was a little on the disturbing side, but you get points for the "human folly" portion of this contest, for sure. You took me on a roller-coaster with this poem, Richard, which shockingly real and vivid descriptions. I don't know how this fared in the contest, but I enjoyed it. Unfamiliar with what "assonance" and "asyndeton" are however...
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Date: 1/13/2016 7:08:00 PM
WOW! I knew I'd be impressed...You've taken it to the next level. You've used those devices in an extremely creative way, I'm still trying to figure some of them out. The rape metaphor was too powerful. You displayed unmatched skills! Reading it feels like watching a Mayweather boxing match, you always have to rewind every little thing to appreciate it more. This should win the first placement, it is in my book.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/13/2016 8:18:00 PM
Your comment makes my day! Thanks Elis, I really appreciate the feedback.
Date: 1/10/2016 8:34:00 PM
Well-done Richard. Verlena
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/10/2016 9:00:00 PM
Thanks again Verlena.
Date: 1/5/2016 6:22:00 PM
I thought I figured out that it was about the earth and its abuse in the first stanza, so you were successful with me, and you built on this in each new line. Much more would tire me. I tried incorporating different figures of speech in my poem 'Rebirth,' which you might read. Happy New Year.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/10/2016 9:01:00 PM
I will check it out. Thanks for commenting. I'm glad I avoided tiring you.
Date: 1/5/2016 7:55:00 AM
Brilliantly creative and a pleasure to read. I lacked the skills to write in this contest and thus had to refrain. Your poem is truly a gem of imagination, creativity and inspired poetry! A7
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/5/2016 8:43:00 AM
Hi Robert, thanks but I am sure if you set your mind to it you would be more than capable of meeting this challenge. I see my message to Dalia also posted to you, you get a bonus hug *lol*
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/5/2016 8:39:00 AM
Thanks a be a big hug back to you.;0)
Date: 1/5/2016 7:30:00 AM
That's a real clincher of a title, and the first line is a pearler of an opener. A write full of style.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/5/2016 8:44:00 AM
Thanks Scott, I'm pleased you like it.
Date: 1/3/2016 7:46:00 PM
Spectacular write my friend that's all what I can say after you have mesmerized me with this incredible poem... Hugs :) dalia
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/3/2016 10:08:00 PM
Thanks a be a big hug back to you.;0)
Date: 1/1/2016 3:52:00 PM
CAme here to say Happy New Year, Richard, and I am happy that you enjoyed this challenge. it really does open us up to new things. I know I have stretched myself in the past and felt very pleased with the results as well.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/2/2016 8:48:00 AM
Thanks Andrea, I hope you enjoyed your New Years.
Date: 1/1/2016 8:45:00 AM
Wish you prosperous Happy New year 2016.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 1/1/2016 9:51:00 AM
You as well BL, you are a thoughtful and gentle soul.
Date: 12/31/2015 4:45:00 PM
I love the way you write Richard. You did an excellent job with this challenge. You are a great poet. A Fav. Happy New Years my friend to you and yours.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/31/2015 4:51:00 PM
Much appreciated Armand! Your last poem is amazing!!!
Date: 12/31/2015 12:33:00 PM
Oh, Richard. I'm sorry. I much prefer when you write in your usual way! I did guess it to be about the abuse of land of some type. Great topic! It's awesome that many poets appreciate this style of writing here. But this is one contest I will never try to enter myself, for it's a style of poetry that goes totally against my grain (Mainly I simply cannot write using surreal images). Well, I could understand this fairly well, and I applaud you for taking the challenge!
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/31/2015 4:22:00 PM
Thanks Andrea, I enjoyed the challenge and I am somewhat pleased with the end result. I never wish to be to obscure with my writing so I feel I have balanced the contest peramiters with my own artistic sensibilities. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Date: 12/31/2015 10:22:00 AM
Wonderful write, Richard! :) Happy New Year’s to you and your lovely wife. Hugs Eve
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/31/2015 10:36:00 AM
Thanks Eve.
Date: 12/30/2015 8:30:00 PM
Hi Richard: I am working on a poem for Cyndi's contest, too, I am a bit unsure of my write, too. Holding off on entering mine until I play with it some more, It is a big undertaking, Your poem is full of language that is very descriptive, The rape metaphor is very strong and the descriptions of the detached bystanders, very captivating. Good Luck with it, SuZ
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/31/2015 1:45:00 AM
Let me know when you post it, I would love to read it. Thanks for your encouraging comment. Happy New year!
Date: 12/30/2015 4:18:00 PM
Hi Richard, I'm impressed --the flow, the alliteration, .... I know it's not fair to say, but you are more of a poet than any of us here...Happy New Year ~LINDA~
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Eve Roper
Date: 12/31/2015 10:20:00 AM
Linda is right you are more of a poet than any of us dear friend :)
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Poet Destroyer A
Date: 12/30/2015 10:12:00 PM
That's exactly what puts you above the WB- BEST... Hugs Richard... LINDA
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 7:01:00 PM
You are sweet, but there are many here that I look up to including yourself. I don't tend to give much thought to poetic devices so this excersize stretched my thinking. Thanks for the thoughtful comment. Hugs Rick.
Date: 12/30/2015 1:43:00 PM
this is an ambitious piece well done..a poetic delight, rich!.. may new year find you in a space of joy.. huggs
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 2:03:00 PM
Thanks Nette, you as well. Hugs Richard.
Date: 12/30/2015 9:31:00 AM
It is a great display of poetic skill, Richard...Fancy words and all. I think you will do well. Hugs
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:32:00 AM
Thanks Eileen, hugs back to you.
Date: 12/30/2015 9:12:00 AM
Impressive Richard. Good luck in the contest.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:28:00 AM
Thanks Rob.
Date: 12/30/2015 8:14:00 AM
A display of poetic perfection dear Richard. A seven! Now,I Just wish you and your family: Happy New Year! May the Good Lord, grant you health, love, happiness And the realization of each of your dreams!
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:29:00 AM
Thanks Demetrios, I also appreciate your blessing.
Date: 12/30/2015 3:53:00 AM
Hi Rick. I've read this twice but I guess I need another read before I can fully grasp essence of this write. I see that this is for a contest. All the best then! Again, Happy New Year!
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:31:00 AM
Thanks Victor, I appreciate the visit and comment.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:30:00 AM
Thanks Kim, it is about the raping of our planet.
Date: 12/29/2015 9:57:00 PM
Phew what an abundance of descriptions, I am anxious to tackle this contest myself your unique phrasing is awesome. Voyeristic aristocracy...be still my heart you have the pen of a poet that I pleasure seek to read! ;) hugs xx
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/30/2015 9:52:00 AM
You are sweet, thanks Casarah. Hugs and Happy New Year!
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