Goldilocks and the Free Beers
The cabin was stood there, its door was ajar
The owners were out but they couldn’t be far
She was so thirsty she needed a drink
Did she wait outside... well what do you think
She pushed on the door, ‘Is there anyone there’
I’m just a wee girl who has long golden hair
She thought to herself there is nobody here
But there on the table three glasses of beer
She stood there a while her hands on her hips
That beer looked refreshing and she licked her lips
One glass was small, it was gone in two sips
Another so big it had double hand grips
She couldn’t resist it she drank that as well
Then eyeballed the middle one, oh, what the hell
A medium glass which was just as well
For she felt her bladder was starting to swell
She went to the loo she was now feeling rough
She heard a door creak and a voice that was gruff
She knew what came next, it was more than a hunch
She knew there was no such thing as a free lunch
And so pretty soon she was pinned to the floor
And paid for the drinks, perhaps a few more
But ‘loving’ for beer? She wished she was dead
And then the big glass fell right on his head
He let out a groan and was totally zonked
A lump on his head from where he’d been bonked
She needed some help, there was no-one about
But Goldilocks belched... and then she passed out
The front door swung open and three bears stood there
What the heck’s going on asked a shocked Mummy bear
Daddy bear grumbled, both confused and mad
And Baby bear said... Who’s under grandad
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