God is a sweet eater

God would eat giant marshmallows the size of mountains, I think. He would turn up his nose at leftovers thrown down the sink. Lollipops and popsicles would be easy for him to reach. Lined up in his bedroom, next to his pet llama, Screech. God would devour tuna and salmon, but leave beef to us. Red meat is a killer, he confides to his servant, Gus. He loves key lime pie, goes to Florida incognito to buy it. Was in line next to you yesterday, please don’t have a fit. German chocolate cake with coconut icing is a favorite of His. He drinks twenty-two cream sodas daily, if they have extra fizz. God is a sweet-eater, he loves sugar, and honey. Salt is also a favorite; he buys potato chips when he finds money.