From the Book Nah You Didn'T By Aussa Hames

OCTOBER 19, 1883, SOME SAY IT WAS A WEDNSDAY: DACKTINSTEIN'S RECORD SAY'S IT WAS A SATURDAY, ALL WE KNOW IS BOTH ACCOUNTS TO THE EVENT SAY'S IT WAS HOT,NEARLY 96 DEGREE'S THA'S HOT FOR THAT TIME OF YEAR, BUT THE TALE OF MISS DRAMPDILL AND HER HUSBAND MR. DRAMPDILL, BECAME OFFICAIL WHEN MR. DRAMPERDILLS MISTERESS WALKED INTO HER LOVER'S HOME WITH HIS WIFE PRESENT, AND DISROBED, TO FIGHT! SHE TOLD MRS DRAMPDILL, SHE HAD HEARD TALE OF HER WHIPPING ON ONE OF THE CHILDREN, FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO SPELL.WELL THE WOMAN GRABBED THE OTHER AND INTRODUCED HERSELF AS BEATTA *****, AND BEGAN WHOOPING ON HER LOVERS WIFE. SHE STOOD ABOUT SIX FOOT FOUR INCHES, SHE WEIGHED A GOOD 340 POUNDS AND WAS AS AGILE AS A BOBCAT, SHE WHIPPED THAT WOAMN IN FRONT OF HER 7 KIDS, AND HER HUSBAND. THE ONLY REASON SHE STOPPED WAS CAUSE SHE SMELL THE PIGFEET ON THE STOVE, SHE STOPPED AND GRABBED THE POT, SHE PUT IT ON THE TABLE, AND PULLED THE MAN WIFE OVER TO HER, AND PUT HER FOOT ON HER TO HOLD HER IN PLACE WHILE SHE ATE, SHE ASKED THE BABY BOY TO GET THE TATER SALLY, HE DID AND THEN SHE TOLD HIM, WHEN YO' PAW FIND OUT SUM OTTA STUFF, I WILL BE YO' NEW MAMMY. WELL THE MOTHER CRAWLED UNDER THE TABLE, AND THAN OUTTA THE HOUSE, ALL WITHOUT THE HELP OF HER HUSBAND AND CHILDREN, WHO ALL JUST SAT AT THE TABLE AND BEGAN EATIN. THEY HADN'T SEEN THEIR MOTHER SINCE. ONE DAY ABOUT 14 YEARS LATER, A CAR PULLED UP IN THE DRIVE WAY, THE NEW MOTHER WAS AT THE CLOTHES LINE. SHE TOLD ONE OF THE BOYS TO COME' ON OUT HERE AND SEE HOW COMPANY WAS, THEY DID, THEN SHE ASKED WELL WHO IS IT, HE SAID I DON'T KNOW THE CAR IS EMPTY. SHE LOOKED CONFUSSED AND STARTED TOWARD THE HOUSE. THAN SHE LOOK AND SAW THE KID'S REAL MOTHER STANDING THEIR, DECKED OUT IN A THREE PEICE DRESS SUIT, ALL PRETTY AND STUFF. THE LARGER LADY SAID "I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE YO' NASTY ASS AGAIN". GO'ON NOW, THIS MY HOUSE, MY RESPONSIBLITY, MY KID'S AND MY MAN, I LOVES DES PEOPLE!" THE MOTHER SAID THAT'S GOOD ALL I CAME HERE FOR IS THE POT YOU WERE EATING PIGFEET OUT OF, I TOLD A GUY THE STORY AND WHEN I TOLD HIM THE POT WAS A BIG POT AND IT WAS FULL, HE DIDN'T BELEIVE IT WHEN I TOLD HIM YOU FINSHED THE WHOLE THING IN TEN MINUTES. the LARGE WOMAN BECAME INRAGED, THE ASS IS FOR BEATIN, GUESS I HAFFTA WHIP IT AGAIN, THEY FOUGHT CREATING A DUST CLOUD, ONLY TO BE SEPARATE BY ONE OF THE KID'S WIFE, THEY THEN WENT IN SIDE TO DISCUSS THE MATTER: THAT'S WHEN.......................................